This Self Care Sunday has no theme. It’s a mixed bag of thoughts and reflects from the week.
First, My three great nieces (14, 13 and 9) are coming to my condo on the beach Friday to Sunday next weekend. It’s the first time they are staying with me. All I am going to say it’s been drama filled already. Lol:-) The 13 year old and I a close but she has been messaging me all week to negotiate. You can imagine how that is starting to get on my nerves 😂 She asked for friends to come. She sent me discount coupons for rides. She even called shotgun for the ride down already 😂 I now understand why their dad(my nephew) told me she was exhausting and gives him a run for his money every day 😂 However, what I also see is that she’s is strategic, a planner, looks for opportunities and is thrifty. OMG! She is just like me 😂 Where this kid crossed the line a little for me was she invited their 18 year old estranged sister, who is not my niece and I’ve never met her in person, to come to condo without asking me first. I said no; there is no room. I am already giving the three girls my bed and I am sleeping on the sofa. I did, however, tell them she can meet up with us on the beach and go to the rides with us if she wants to drive down for a day trip only. This was me practicing self care and enforcing boundaries. I hope next weekend is just fun without any drama. Stay tuned on this one; I don’t think I heard the last of this yet 😂
I woke up Saturday tired, sore, grumpy and in no mood to do anything. I had a long work week. My brain was tired. I was tired of talking, presenting and collaborating. I wanted to retreat to my corner and hide. I forced myself to walk up the local cafe for breakfast. I forced myself to walk three miles with a half hour break mid way through. When I got home at 1:00pm yesterday, I ended up falling a sleep on the sofa for two hours. When I woke up, I was even more exhausted and ended just watching “Orange is the New Black” for the rest of they day, eating Wawa Chocolate Peanut Butter Ice Cream for dinner and going to bed at 9pm.
I woke up this morning feeling guilty for doing nothing yesterday😏But, I am also feeling physically better. I am energized. I have no pain or stiffness. I feel rested. I walked five miles by 10:00am. When I got home from walking, I no longer feel guilty about doing nothing yesterday because I realized my body was just tired and must have just needed the rest. It’s ok to rest. In reality, I practiced good self care yesterday by just letting my body have the rest it obviously needed. As far as the ice cream for dinner, Wawa Chocolate Peanut Butter Ice Cream is my favorite. It’s ok to eat something you really enjoy once in while even if it has no nutritional value 😉 It was delicious 😋
Finances were brought to my attention yesterday too. I generally do not keep balances on credit cards. However, between going back to school, buying the new car and making changes so I would be more physically comfortable, I’ve accumulated some debt. Let me also say being sick and having health problems isn’t cheap. A lot of cash in the last year has gone to doctor appointment copays, physical therapy co pays and prescriptions. Also, the Integrative doctor I see is cash only. The food I eat is gluten free and organic; both are expensive. I am completely self-sufficient and independent. I live a modest lifestyle and finance my own activities. So, I am solely responsible for looking for ways to conserve cash.I also plan to double down on credit card payments going forward and stick to budget because having debt is kind of freaking me out. It may take a year to pay it off. So this means no vacations or large expenses until it’s paid down. I am ok with that. However, I will not start my new budget until after the girls visit next week. I am not going to be cheap the one weekend of the year they are here. It’s good self care to check-in with your finances and stick to a budget.
With the recent flare-up of tummy troubles and the recent congenital arrhythmia checkup, I started to be honest with myself that perhaps stress is playing a bigger role in health issues than I was willing to admit. The reality is I am under a lot of pressure in this new job. I am enjoying this role/job but it is A LOT of responsibility. I interact with Managers and Executives across many organizations in the company all day long. This is new for me. I went from a staff/support role to a high level of visibility and responsibility. It’s stressful. I’m still adjusting. That is just the truth. Also, the position is still considered only temporary; it could end in February but it could also be made permanent. No decision about that has been made yet. That also adds pressure and leaves me in a “unknown” status because I am pretty sure I want to stay here 😊 There is just more room for me breathe in this group. My boss allows me to do my job freely. We have a strictly professional type of relationship – no friendship or strong loyalty one way or the other but we do work well together. We check-in, he’s there if I need him, he offers coaching when it’s needed, he pulls me back if necessary but he does not micro-manage me or my career. I am free. This works well for me because I am self motivated. I’ve also had a few interesting conversations with Executives this past week. They offered to smooth the way for me and remove roadblocks to make things easier for me. I was given the indication the hope is I will CHOOSE to stay when the time comes. They also offered help with that too. We will see how that plays out.
A few weeks ago, my new boss offer to pay for my travel to go to PMP Bootcamp in DC for a week in August. He told me it wasn’t a requirement and I do not need it for my job. He just wanted to offer me the opportunity. I said yes at the time. I went back to him this week and told him it’s just not a good time for me to do it. It would create stress in my life. I feel like it would be best for me to just focus on outreach and implementation of my program in work and self care outside of work. He told me he completely understood; no worries. The offer is available to me as long as I am in his group. It’s completely up to me. It was good self care for me to express how I truly felt about the job to the Execs. It was good self care to admit the stress is taking a bigger toll on me than I realized. It was good self care to take steps to eliminate stress I see in the near future. It was good self care to prioritize where I expend my energy in the coming weeks. While I am still going to DC in mid-August, it’s for work related meetings. I am also staying at the hotel close to work that I really like again 🙂 That also makes it less stressful. I do enjoy going to DC and looking forward to going for this trip.
With all of this said, I have an appointment with my therapist tomorrow night. She will be getting an earful. She will be proud of me for learning to manage stress better. I highly recommend cognitive therapy and taking the time to step back from your life to reflect.
What have you done to take care of yourself this week? Did you rest? Where you honest with yourself? Did you eliminate stress? Have you dug into your finances lately to really understand where all the money is going? Did you express your needs to someone who can help you?
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