I feel this horoscope today. I mean I really feel it… I deserve to express my creativity in a healthy environment. Considering the toxic work environment I am in, this really hit me hard today.

A high level Manager called me directly today.  She said, “If you leave, I get it. I completely understand. Just so you know, you are a rock star and I would hire you back in second. But I understand this isn’t the situation you thought you were signing up for…However, know if you go, you will be killing this program because I am not sure how we will move forward without YOU now; YOU ARE THIS PROGRAM. This is your blood, sweat and tears. This should be your victory at some point…So, what will it take, what can I do, if anything, to fix this with you and make this a healthier place for you to work?”

Yep, it’s come to that point…

After taking a breathe, I took a fairly good shot at her… I explained that I’ve been telling them for months the house was on FIRE and no one was listening to me. She said she agreed and stated that it was now a “volcano and we are all lit up!” 🔥We both laughed.  Then I said, “First, I do not want to brief Executives – period! I am STAFF. I am not a manager. I do not make the decisions. I will be glad to prepare any manager to brief the Execs. I will be glad to attend as a SME (if needed) but I don’t want to be the one answering the questions – period!” She said, “DONE!” 🤣I wasn’t expecting that to be so easy.  After that, I asked her to let me calm down and think about it. I was too emotionally and emotionally spent to talk anymore.  I later received a note from her saying today’s meeting went exceptionally well and everyone was commenting what I great job I was doing.  But the question is… do I even care anymore?

I literally have never been in a professional situation like this before… NEVER. I really wanted to reach out to my Blue Eyed “Secret Fliration” but I figured he’s working from home due to Corona Virus and his family is probably home with him. I don’t want to reach and get him into any trouble. But I really needed him today. Instead I reached out to my former GM and asked her if she could offer me any advice. I then sent a note signing off my work computer early so I could take a migraine medicine and prevent the attack that was about to happen.

So, what do we think? Is it time to just say…

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