Blue Love Letter

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Dear Beloved:
I never wanted to love you. I never planned to love you. Love wasn’t what I had on my mind. I wanted fuck you. It was a sexual attraction. It was a physical attraction but something happened along the way. I fell down into the rabbit hole of your beautiful blue eyes. I have been stuck here ever since. Much like Alice when she fell into Wonderland, I find myself seeing thing differently. Feeling things I never wanted to feel for a man again. Unlike Alice, I’ve cursed my way through this by routinely asking myself “What the fuck? How? When? Why?” Those questions are rhetorical, of course.

We drift through this beautiful life; moving through one phase to another. We come together. We move apart. Now we are in a separation phase of our journey. We are separate but still connected. We are separate but both growing, learning about ourselves, healing, reenergizing and reconnecting to our authentic selves. I have faith our separation is for a greater purpose. It will ultimately be for our highest good.

As I call you to mind and feel my heart swell with love and affection for you, I want you to know I love you. Nothing has changed for me in our separation. I still love you. I still desire you. I am still stuck in the wonderland of your blue eyes. I am, however, aware this is a time of great change for you. It’s your time to rest. It’s your time to reconnect with family and friends. It’s your time to listen to what is in your heart. Follow where your intuition leads you. See what you need to see. Feel what you need to feel. This is your time to choose the life you want after so many years of living up to expectations. This is your time to finally find what is authentic and true for you.

Take comfort. I am still here holding love in my heart for you but I also know you need this time, you need this space from us for a while. So, if you don’t hear from me, please know I am not remaining distant because I don’t love you. It’s actually quiet the opposite. I am remaining distant to give you the room to choose the life you want without any outside noise or influence from me. I have no expectations of you.

You see my beloved, I grew up. I learned what real grown up unconditional love really is. I learned love is not attachment. Love is not needy. Love is not conditional. Love has no expectations. Love, truly loving you, means I want you to be happy, with or without me. I am here if/when you are ready connect. I am hoping to hear from you and see your beautiful eyes again. I welcome a reunion with you.  But I finally love myself enough that I will be thankful for the role you played in my life even if our separation remains permanent. I will love you for the impact and influence you have had on my life. I will love you for reigniting passion in body. My love for you is big enough, deep enough and wide enough to give you space to find your life even if it ends up not being with me.

Beloved, please know you are love and missed.  We are separate but still connected in our hearts.
(C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC ~ All Rights Reserved

Everything is always working out for my highest good💙🦋

NOTE This love letter for Blue Love was pushing at the edges of my heart all damn day. I couldn’t wait to get home and write it out of me💙💙

This is the third day of my new job. Wow! It’s gonna be a whirlwind. It involves interacting with congressional liaisons, working with the highest levels of management and, I found out today may even include establishing a not for profit company. Holy crap! My dream came true ✨ It scares the crap out of me 🤣I’ve been pretty stressed out all week. I am not good with change. My belly is freaking out; my nerves are raw. I will be glad to get my first week over✌️

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Loving Kindness Prayer
May you be safe
May you be healthy
May you be happy
May you be loved

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Self Care Sunday ~ Fresh Start

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I have a fresh start on Monday. I start a new job. I finally close the door on one chapter of my life and move on to the next. While I’ve enjoyed my time working on my current team, it is beyond time for me to move on.

The new job has possibilities. I have absolutely no idea what’s going to happen. Yes, it is a promotion. More than the money, I am excited about the possibilities of where it could take me and the growth opportunities it will offer me. It’s a fresh start.  Am I nervous? Heck yes. Anything new can be scary. It’s definitely going to stretch me and require a different version of Linda than I’ve been in recent months. I am good with that.

I am in an active flare-up of some chronic tummy issues. Most of the bloating and gas have passed and right now I am having some trouble getting the acid reflux symptoms to calm down. It’s going to take a few more days. It’s a flare. Flares come and then fade away. This one will fade away. But it has been a good reminder for me as I go into this new job that self care comes first; I must create and enforce proper boundaries for self care. Let the chips fall where they may. I am not really worried about continued career advancement as the next step would be management. I am not really interested in being a manager. Too much responsibility; dealing with other peoples problems all day and getting caught up in office politics really isn’t my thing. I am not interested in taking that on in my 50s. But, I do want to be the best Lead for my team that I can be. I want to practice good self care and also encourage the folks around me to do the same. This will affect positive change.

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It’s interesting. Whenever my tummy trouble flares up, I always retreat. Heck, I am introvert. I retreat most weekend but when I am sick I retreat into my bed. I withdrawal from interaction. I go within. I withdrew from my social life for a month to recharge and heal my body. It’s eight years later and I still haven’t completely reengaged 🤣

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Some of the greatest opportunities of growth I’ve experienced have come during or after a flare up of health issues. This time I spend quiet and alone gives me space to process and think through new ideas around growth and spirituality. I also know how to take care of myself when a flare hits now…Up the medicine. Lite exercise to move things along in my bowel. Restrict the diet. Look through my food diary for triggers. Pray and mediate to keep myself calm and peaceful while I ride out the worst parts of it. Focus my attention on good things like writing this blog and reading inspiration posts on Instagram. Lol 🙂 Flares are temporary. As my best friend used to say to me whenever she had a bad day during her battle with Cancer, “this too shall pass”.

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Unfortunately, I canceled dinner with friends this week because I didn’t feel well. I can’t wait to reschedule it. They normally let me pick since I have the food issues. We always end up at Steve & Cookies which is a local upscale restaurant. I also like upscale steakhouses or any place I can get Salmon. My belly likes expensive restaurants and frowns on bar food. 🙂 I also cancelled a massage this week. It’s never good to get a massage when you are already sick. Massages can trigger a detox. I didn’t need to add any more population or toxic waste into my body 🙂

Today is Sunday. I woke up to a second mass shooting in less than 24 hours. Putting politics aside, I offer the Metta Prayer to all beings in the Universe. I hope the dark psychic force that has taken hold in the United States is over powered by love and peace.

Metta Prayer

ICYMI – I’ve been posting every day this week since I haven’t been working; scroll down to see all of my posts from this week. I am not sure I will have time to write the next few days so have a safe Sunday and great week.

(C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC ~ All Rights Reserved

Everything is always working out for my highest good💙🦋

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Loving Kindness Prayer
May you be safe
May you be healthy
May you be happy
May you be loved

Irritable Bowel Syndrome Is Irritating

Screen Shot 2019-08-03 at 10.07.33 AMToday I am sharing some information about living with Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS). While it may be too much information for some, I am really just sharing in case anyone needs the information and for awareness.

I’ve had the symptoms of IBS most of my adult life I just didn’t know that what it was. My flare symptoms include gas, bloating, stomach pain in the left flank area, burping, hiccups, acid reflux, alternating constipation and diarrhea, sweating, fatigue, stuffy nose, nausea and etc. It can really make me miserable and that’s why I try to very hard to keep it under control.

While I’ve had the symptoms most of my life, I was only diagnosed about six or seven years ago. At the time, I had IBS-C which means I had constipation on a regular basis. In recent years, my flare-ups can swing either way IBS-C or IBS-D (diarrhea). I was even put a medication when I was first diagnosed to help relax my bowel and reduce bloating. The medication was unsuccessful. I have had more success with controlling my diet and getting regular exercise.

IBS can be triggered by food, mediations, emotions, stress, environmental issues and weight changes. My biggest personal triggers are dietary, lack of physical exercise and stress. I force myself to get at least 30 minutes of lite exercise even if I don’t feel well because it helps move things along in my gut.

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I started seeing a Gastro specialist at Jeff in Philly. He diagnosed me with Pancreatic Enzyme Deficiency which he believes is underlying cause of the IBS. In other words, I don’t have enough Pancreatic Enzymes to digest food properly which means they rot in my gut if I am not properly elimination which triggers the symptoms. He prescribed a prescription strength Digest Enzymes to take with meals. It can have an explosive effect so I don’t use it every meal. He also diagnosed me is Small Intestine Bacteria Overgrowth (SIBO). SIBO happens when bacteria from undigested food in the lower gut comes up into the upper gut. It is triggered by not properly digesting food. SIBO is the Trojan horse of IBS and requires a course of antibiotics to settle the gut bacteria down.

I am current on an antibiotic. The doctor prescribe one that would get my sinuses and my gut bacteria. In some ways, I feel better. In other ways, I am still in thick of it. Once a flare-up is triggered, it takes some time to settle down. It slowly fades away. I get the most relief for extended periods of time when I follow the Low FODMAP diet. This diet only limits carbs that are fermentable oligo-, di-, monosaccharides and polyols.  While the diet is restrictive, it has been a Godsend. I learned I can eat food that normally trigger me. It about the portion size but there are still foods I can NOT tolerate. As of last week, I am back on a highly restrictive version of Low FODMAP to help settle things down. Spiritually I always trust my gut but physical – I agree that my gut is bastard!

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As I look back on my food diary, I can see where I slipped up. I expanded my diet too far. I was eating beans. BEANS! WTF Linda? I don’t really tolerate beans well. Especially Chickpeas and Black Beans. I can eat Chili occasionally as long as it is cooked a long time. I was eating Cherries and Blueberries – both are high FODMAP. That combo alone could have trigged a flare up. I was eating raw veggies. While I can tolerate a salad when I am feeling good and take a digest enzyme, I can’t really tolerate a lot of raw veggies. Cooked veggies are usually ok. Apples. OMG. The Green Apple almost killed me. I felt my belly immediately swell up. Did I not learn anything from Adam and Eve about Apples🍏

If you’d like more information on IBS, Dr. Axe and Dr. Mark Hyman are great Functional doctors with good tips:  Here are a couple of links to get you to their sites.

https://draxe.com/health/gut-health/ibs-diet-food-cures/

https://drhyman.com/blog/2015/04/17/powerful-strategies-to-eliminate-ibs-other-gut-issues/

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So here I am. Still bloating. Still with upper left flank discomfort. Still alternating between IBS-C and IBS-D. Just getting through every day waiting for the flare up to fade away but the reality is it’s going to be a few more days. Yes, I will going back to work not feeling a 100% but it’s ok. I am a remote employee. They even told me I can telework more often if needed. I worked for my new GM last year. We’ve become friendly. She recruited me knowing my issues. She knows my belly issues won’t hold me back in work.

If you are having any symptoms that could be IBS, I suggest you make an appointment with Gastro specialist. You will need your Pancreatic Enzyme levels checks. You will need breathe tests for SIBO and other gut absorption issues. You will need an Upper GI with biopsy and maybe a Colonoscopy. I’ve had it all.

ICYMI – I’ve been posting every day this week since I haven’t been working; scroll down to see all of my posts from this week. I will post my regular Self Care Sunday blog tomorrow morning instead of later tonight.  After tomorrow’s post, I will be taking a break from writing for a few days.

(C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC ~ All Rights Reserved

Everything is always working out for my highest good💙🦋

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Loving Kindness Prayer
May you be safe
May you be healthy
May you be happy
May you be loved

Self Care is an act of surrender

surrenderToday is Friday and I’ve been off from work most of the week. I started an antibiotic for my Sinuses and Ears yesterday. I had to wait a couple of days for my tummy to settle down a bit before starting it. I think it’s already working because I am starting to cough stuff up. My plan for today is to just take it easy and let my body heal. I can’t do any more than I am doing. So, I just have to take care of myself and go for the ride.

The Engineers working on the brick outside of my unit are doing a water test this morning to see if any water gets in. They will be in my unit and on my balcony for a few hours this morning. I am glad they are doing it. My unit will be the first done and I will know for sure they are fixing the leak properly because we only get one shot at this. It’s a big expensive job. The Condo Association did an assessment to pay for it. My building currently has two assessment on top of regular condo fees and I heard there may be a third. This is why I would never buy in this building. It’s an old building that needs a lot of repairs.

A note about my Social Media presence. Self Care in the digital era has to include good hygiene and self care on Social Media. I deleted my Facebook account last year. I do not even miss it. Guess what? I could care less what my old grade school classmates are up to. I don’t give a crap what girls I went to high school with are doing now. Most of the stuff on Facebook is bullshit anyway. No one really posts truth. Facebook lacks authenticity and they are manipulating people, basically doing mind control with algorithms. If you don’t believe me, there are plenty of documentaries on PBS, Amazon, You Tube and Netflix to back me up. Here’s one:

I have an Instagram account because I like the pictures and I do find some inspirational stuff on there that I use for this blog. I recently made the account private/locked as I do not want to grow the account any further but if you’d like to follow it, the handle is @HighestGoodLife222

I like Twitter. I have a small Twitter account for writing and holistic wellness that is attached to this blog in the right side bar. I try to keep that account Vanilla and on topic. I am not actively trying to grow the account. I do have a larger political Twitter account under a fake name. It’s my rage against the Administration account. I am not trying to grow but it seems to be happening organically. The handle is @highestgoodlife

As I work my way through this flare up of physical issues, I will admit it’s given me an opportunity to reflect. I looked at my food diary and I must admit I was cheating ALOT. I’ve been physically active and doing good with my spiritual work but my food choices have not been good lately. The Low FODMAP Diet is the best lifestyle for my gut. I feel my best when I stick to it. It’s restrictive but I do normally feel good and avoid IBS flare-ups (bloating) when I stick to it. It’s funny because folks always tell people to eat raw veggies to be healthy but in my situation large quantities of raw veggies are undigestible and rot in my gut.

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The truth is I was out of balance. This hard stop was going to happen eventually. It’s good it happened now before I start the new job when I had a week to surrender. I had a conversation this morning with my new team/boss. I already know what my focus will be next week and I am scheduled to go to DC on Thursday for my face to face 1:1 meetings. For now – I am resting and focusing on self care.

ICYMI – I’ve been posting every day this week since I haven’t been working; scroll down to see all of my posts from this week. I will post again on Saturday and my regular Self Care Sunday post.

(C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC ~ All Rights Reserved

Everything is always working out for my highest good💙🦋

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Loving Kindness Prayer
May you be safe
May you be healthy
May you be happy
May you be loved

Strength

Screen Shot 2019-08-01 at 8.18.59 AMIt’s strange. I went to the Chiropractor yesterday. He told me he already had five patients this week with Upper Trap tightness with tummy issues and fatigue. He was wondering if a virus is going around. Honestly, that would be good. Viruses leave as quick as they come when they are done.

It definitely feels like my body is trying to clear something. I have other muscle pains too and I am runned down. It’s frustrating. I felt good for a while and last couple of weeks really are knocking the crap out of me. I can’t find a comfortable way to sleep. It’s frustrating because I start a new job on Monday and I would like to be 100%. I have nothing planned for the next four days and will be focusing on taking care of myself. I have to find a balance because my body doesn’t like too much rest. I need to move a little too. I also wondering if Menopause is playing a role in this and it probably is an Autoimmune Flare up. UGH….All I can do is relax, take care of myself and ride the wave. Work will be fine. It’s a new job but with folks who know me and even though I haven’t started the job officially yet I have been participating in meetings even this week from home.

I’ve been thinking a lot about my hair lately mostly because I am happy my hair is healthy again. Having healthy hair is not vanity it also speaks to self confidence and self image.  I’ve always believed it doesn’t matter how you feel as long as you look good.  That means if I am sick, I don’t want to look sick.  Many don’t realize I cut my hair short a few years ago because I had Alopecia and it was falling out. I have autoimmune system issues. I really never know how it will manifest. The hairstylist told me my bald spots would be less noticeable if my hair was shorter. It took a long time for my scalp to heal. I started growing my hair out because it started coming in curly and thicker. It’s finally at a length I can pull it back a bit. While I am still not sure what length I want to keep it long term, I am keeping it red. Here are some photos of my hair over the years. I think the best length for me is somewhere between the chin and shoulder. Check out the below photos and let me know what length you like 😄

The below photo is from Atlantic City’s St. Patrick’s Day 2010💚OMG, what a fun day! My hair was longer, thick, curly and healthy! I was drinking Jameson and Miller Lite all day.  I was in good form most of the day.  My best friend’s husband cut us both off around 9pm  🤣

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This photo was taken in April 4, 2015. One day before I cut it short.
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This photo was taken on April 6, 2015.  The day I cut it short.

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This photo was taken in 2017 on my 50th birthday.

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This photo was taken in June 2019 after I dyed my hair red.

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(C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC ~ All Rights Reserved

Everything is always working out for my highest good💙🦋

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Loving Kindness Prayer
May you be safe
May you be healthy
May you be happy
May you be loved

Dog Days Of Summer

Pitbull Rescue
Since I am off from work this week, I am going to try to write a little each day. I will use my blog as a daily journal entries more or less.

I want a dog!  🐶 I wanted to rescue a Pit Bull specifically but I live in a high-rise and can’t have a dog over 25 pounds in this building.  I love living in a condo in a high rise. It’s so convenient and safe.  Unfortunately, that means for now I am getting my Pit Bull puppy loving from my great nephew dog and sticking with high-rise living. Please see the below link to the a Pit Bull Rescue Organization and below is a photo of my nephew asking me for a slice of ham🐶😍

Pit Bull

May I have some ham please Aunt Linda?

http://pitbull.rescueme.org/NewJersey

Next, I went to the doctor yesterday with a list of issues one of which is a strained trap muscle. The doctor talked me into trying a small dose of muscle relaxer at bedtime last night to see if it helped. As the drug started to take affect, I felt like I had no control over my body and I started to get anxiety. Seriously, I started freaking out. Here is the reason I became anxious when I started feeling strange, I live alone. There is no one here to help me if the drug has a bad affect. There is no one here to talk me off the ledge at 1:00am when I am feeling like maybe I can’t breathe asking myself is it anxiety or is it a reaction to the drug. It was a long night. I survived😂 I will not be taking it again. I will deal with the pain. The muscle will eventually work it’s way out and I have a massage scheduled for Friday.

I also talked to the doc about a recent flare up of stomach issues. Let me just say, I OWN this one. As I was talking to her, I realized I did it to myself. I expanded my diet too far. As she started asking me about my diet recently, I said something about eating raw veggies. She started tapping on her laptop and then said, “since you have Pancreatic Enzyme Deficiency you don’t have the juice in your gut to digest raw veggies. They will just sit there and rot. A salad once in a while is ok, but you can’t eat raw every day and especially don’t eat them at dinner!” That’s when she started laughing. Apparently, I looked guilty. Yes, I have been poisoning myself with raw veggies. I can’t make this shit up. I’ll be on a bland diet for a few weeks until I get my gut settled down.

That’s all for today. I will write again tomorrow.
(C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC ~ All Rights Reserved

Everything is always working out for my highest good💙🦋

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Loving Kindness Prayer
May you be safe
May you be healthy
May you be happy
May you be loved

Staycation Starts Today ~ July 30th

staycation

The past week or so has been a challenging self care week. Mostly because I was resisting and pushing my body when it just needed me to slow down.

I start a new job on Monday, August 5th. I went into work yesterday (Monday) morning and realized I had nothing to do all week. All of my work was already transitioned to other people. I was chatting with my coworker who sits next to me. She said, “If I were you, I would be taking the opportunity to take a few days off to rest and relax before jumping into the new job next week!” It took me less than a minute to realize she was right. I reached out to current and new managers for approval to take off the rest of the week; all approved. I am off from work until when I start my new job on Monday, August 5th.

Yes, I am on a staycation of sorts but I also need to use this time to rest, heal and take care of myself. I am still healing an Upper Trapezius muscle injury. After having a migraine this weekend and having a small fever, I realized I have a sinus issue. I have a doctor’s appointment this afternoon. So, yes. I am off from work this week focusing on rest, beach, pool, sleep and decompressing before jumping into a fire next week.

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I’d like to remind folks, that good stress is still stress. Accepting a new job (good stress) is very exciting but it has also been stressful navigating the process. The process took three months – three months. The body doesn’t know the difference between good and bad stress. It just knows it’s stressed. Sustained stress takes a toll on the body. Eventually the body will react. My body reacted to good stress with muscle tension which set me up for a pull Upper Trap Muscle. My body reacted to good stress with a migraine. I was putting pressure on myself to ramp up in the new job while also transitioning out of the old job. It was too much. I was doing more than anyone expected of me. This is an accurate depiction of my spirit guides rolling their eyes as I repeat that same lesson over and over again without learning it🤣

Rolling-my-eyes-so-hard

One other thing that has been causing me some stress is the exterior work being done on my building. One of the units on the corner is mine. The bad news is they are doing the work to fix a water leak issue in my unit. The smell of mold and mildew when they started the work was intense and nauseating. I bought a product to help with it and that contributed to the headache. I threw it out and have air purifiers running 24 hours a day now. The good news is the worst is over. They removed all of the affected materials and the smell is gone. Once the exterior work is done, the interior dry wall has to be pulled down and my carpet has to be cleaned or removed. I will probably stay in a hotel during that week or hopefully be in DC for work. The other good news is once all of this done the air quality in my unit will be healthier. I actually looked at a couple of condos for sale in another high rise on the bay last week. I would have to take a loan from my 401K to buy it. Not sure how I feel about that. So, I haven’t done anything yet.

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Today’s plan is to do NOTHING – until I go to doctor’s this afternoon. I hope to write more this week but I have no idea what I will be doing every day. I suspect I will be sitting by the pool a lot. My immediate goal is only to get rid of the headache and fever right now.
(C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC ~ All Rights Reserved

Everything is always working out for my highest good💙🦋

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Loving Kindness Prayer
May you be safe
May you be healthy
May you be happy
May you be loved

Self Care Sunday ~ The Migraine Maker

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Sigh…long sigh 😔 i’ve had a run- in with the “Migraine Maker” and lost😂 The “Migraine Maker” is the Upper Trapezius Muscle located on the inside of the Shoulder. I tend to carry stress and tension in my neck/shoulders 😳I strained my left Trap last weekend carrying a bag that was too heavy. I think my bra straps were a little tight too. Keeping natural 38 DDDs upright, perky and facing forward isn’t always easy🙅‍♀️These graphics show where the Trap Muscle refers pain.

It’s not the first time I irritated the Upper Trap Muscles. I made the right Trap angry a few years back. It took six weeks to resolve. Admittedly, I didn’t know how to take care of it back then. After a previous round of physical therapy, I know what to do this time and hopefully it will resolve in less than two weeks. I didn’t bother going to the doctor because I know what it is and I know what she would say. Rest, ice and heat. She would offer me a muscle relaxer which would decline. We would commiserate about me not being able to take NSAIDS (Advil, Aleve and Naproxen) because of an Aspirin allergy. She would ask if I wanted an X-ray or physical therapy; both of which I would decline because I’ve been here and done this before. Time is the healer and some way to control pain would be helpful. This was also a reminder to stay committed in doing my shoulder stretches and exercises. I am really kicking myself for cancelling my massage appointment last week. I could have nipped this before it blew up like this.

After a three mile walk today with a migraine and a trip to the grocery store for produce and Green Juice, I decided to surrender. I retreated to my bed with a dose of Fioricet and Magnesium for pain with a moist heating pad on my back and neck. After resting for an hour hoping the drugs would kick in, I am now in my comfy bed writing this blog hoping relief will come soon. So, why did I walk three miles with a migraine? I did it mostly because I wanted to sweat and detox a bit. That’s also the reason I bought Green Juice for the week, produce, Chicken and Eggs. I decided to take the opportunity to limit my diet for a couple of weeks to give my body a reset. I am also detoxing my armpits and body from traditional deodorant so I can return to natural deodorant. I’ll be showering often but could get extra stinky by tomorrow 🤣You have to detox (sweat out the chemicals of traditional deodorant) for a few days before starting a natural deodorant or the natural won’t be as effective. I’ve used natural deodorant but I didn’t do the detox part so now I am trying it. Saturday night detox dinner is Veggies with Ranch Dressing with Bing Cherries & Blueberries for dessert to help reduce inflammation.

Self Care isn’t always pretty or enjoyable. I could have tried to push myself to go sit by the pool in the sun instead of resting in bed but why? A cool dark room is comforting when you have a headache. I also recently bought a Blush Duvet Cover and sheets with Roses on them so my bedroom looks soft and pretty. I wanted Blush on my bed because Pink is a healing color for the Heart Chakra. It helps to balance and open the Heart Chakra energies. I wanted to be surrounded by Pink as I slumber. The hand crocheted blanket was made for me by my sister, Sandra, a few years before she passed away.

Bedding

rose quartz

Here are some self care tips on taking care of your Trapezius Muscles below from

https://myemail.constantcontact.com/The–Migraine-Maker—-Can-this-Shoulder-Muscle-be-the-Cause-of-Your-Headache-.html?soid=1101121545271&aid=F4kTfHC2oo4

migraine maker

If you do have a run in with the “Migraine Maker”, remember to rest the injured muscle before trying to stretch and strengthen it. Also make sure your bedroom is comforting so if you do need to retreat for the day, you can feel nurtured and peaceful in your surroundings.
(C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC ~ All Rights Reserved

Everything is always working out for my highest good💙🦋

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Loving Kindness Prayer
May you be safe
May you be healthy
May you be happy
May you be loved

What Is Love?

Truth ~ Blue Love Poetry
Tell me your truth
Show me
Who you really are
Take off
The mask with me
You are safe
You are free
You are free
To be
Your authentic
Beautiful self
When you are
With me
(C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC ~ All Rights Reserved

Everything is always working out for my highest good💙🦋

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Loving Kindness Prayer
May you be safe
May you be healthy
May you be happy
May you be loved

NOTE

I’ve been thinking a lot about what is love. What does it mean to love someone; really love someone. People often think about romance when it comes to love. They think doing for others is the expression of love. In other words, love is active. Meaning you have to do something to express it and show it.

Lately, I’ve been thinking about demonstrating love in a passive sense – by not doing. In other words, perhaps the greatest proof you love someone is being strong enough to give them room and space to find their life. Perhaps when you really love someone, you can step back and let them find their happiness knowing you may not be part of it. Perhaps the greatest act of love is simply encouraging someone to find their truth and follow their truth wherever it takes them.

For me, love is truth. Living in truth is an expression of self love.  Are you loving yourself today?

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Self Care Sunday – Love

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It’s around 11:00am on Saturday morning. It’s about 90 degrees on the breach in Atlantic City, NJ with a heat index already 100. I walked to the coffee shop this morning. It’s three miles round trip. At first, it wasn’t so bad walking in the shade but walking back in the sun was harder than I thought it would be. I also noticed my heart rate was higher than normal when I walk. I have an arrhythmia that has been stable; I don’t need to take any chances with that getting push out of rhythm by heat issues.  I am staying inside the rest of day and not sure about tomorrow. That is good self care.

While I was walking, I was thinking about how do you support someone who is going through a major life transition? The below words came to me as almost a stream of consciousness. I wrote a lot of them while sitting at the coffee shop sipping my iced coffee.
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So you make it to your 50s in pretty good shape. You still look pretty good. You are healthy and have a few dollars in the bank. You have everything you ever wanted yet you are still unhappy and unfulfilled. What the fuck! Right? I know the feeling…It happened to me a few years ago.

We’ve all heard of the stereotypical mid-life crisis when you buy sports cars and bang 30 year olds. That’s not what I am talking about. I am talking about more of a spiritual awakening where your awareness is opened. It’s more about growth and finding fulfillment on deeper level than filling a void.

As for myself, I lived in denial and resistance for while. I held on. I held on until I was almost consumed with sadness and depression. The below photo is an actual depiction of me trying to hold onto to what was no longer serving my highest good 🤣 The day eventually came that holding on was harder than finding the courage within myself to let go.
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Once I let go, I needed time to rest. I wore myself out trying to hold and be what everyone else wanted or needed me to be. I needed rest before I did anything else. At that time I had more questions about my life and my future than I had answers. What I eventually realized was that time of my life was about finding the answers. It was about diving deep within myself to learn who I was and what I wanted for my future. I learned that time was about revisiting painful events from my past to make peace with them and mostly it was a time of self acceptance for me. I no longer was the same person I had been. I changed. I finally accepted it and embraced the journey to finding the new me.

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Since I’ve been through this experience, I can recognize it when I see someone else going through it. My advice is to enjoy the ride. Pull the threads in your life. Eventually you will figure out what you want and need in your life. This is your time to choose your life… While the giver in me wants to help in some way as an expression of support, I know it’s an inside job for the person who is going through it.  I know the best thing I can do for anyone I care about going through this is just give them space and time to find their answers. They already know I love and care about them. I will send love. I will hold space in my heart for them. I will hope to hear from them soon. I will go about living my best life knowing what is meant for me will be mine when the time is right.

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If you resonant with this post and find yourself having a dark night of the soul, I would encourage you to pull on the threads of your unhappiness. Find your answers. Enjoy your time of self discovery.

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Warning, I am about to get political. What is happening in America now is a battle between two extreme political positions – extreme right which seems to have chosen racism and hate speech vs. the extreme left (progressives). But the reality is the folks in the middle like me, a pragmatic Democrat, will decide the election in 2020. I chose LOVE. I choose love over hate. There is no room in my life anymore for anyone who chooses hate or uses hate speech.  I don’t mind friends being in a different political party but I have no tolerance for hate and racism – NONE, ZERO!

#MALA – Make America Love Again!

make America love again
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Loving Kindness Prayer
May you be safe
May you be healthy
May you be happy
May you be loved