Self Care Sunday ~ My WHY

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I had a super crazy busy stressful intense work week. By Wednesday, I could feel it taking a toll. In the afternoon walked out into the hallway break room to get a bottle of water before a meeting. When I got back to my desk, I realized I lost my phone. Since I have an Apple Watch, I can tell when my phone is within range of my watch. When I got to the break room, I could see it was near by. So I pinged it. There was a guy I didn’t know standing on the other side of room. We were both confused because we could both hear it but not see it. Then he leaned over and put his ear close to the trash can and said, “OMG, it’s in here! You threw out your iPhone!”🤣As I pulled it out of the trash he said, “Man, I don’t think I even want to know what’s going on in your world today. You threw out your iPhone and didn’t even know it! ” 🤣 Yep, I threw out a $600 iPhone and didn’t even realize it; that is how preoccupied I was with this damn job.

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After spending a whole week working very closely with my Director to give presentations to her bosses and external stakeholders, she said to me on Thursday, “Every aspect of this is hard and complicated. We just have to remember the good you are doing for the industry in the long run!”😄 It was in that moment I remembered my professional “WHY”. The reason I took the job in the first place is that ten years down the road I will be able to look back at this time and say I played a role in changing the workforce in my industry. The new programs I am working to establish will develop and change workforce in my industry for the future. I am starting it. I’ve said since day one, I only want to make a meaningful contribution. I want to make a difference. God gave me what I asked for but he never said it would be easy 🤣 He also didn’t tell me I would throw away a $600 iPhone because I was so preoccupied by the damn job but he certainly gave me what I asked for. He gave me a way to make real difference not only in my organization, not just in my “company” but in the whole damn industry. God is good.

While the situation with the phone was funny and my coworkers were cracking up, the truth is…it worried me that I did it. It’s not the first time I’ve been so preoccupied that I did something stupid since starting this job. It was a wake up call for me. I need find a new way to manage the pressure and responsibilities of this job with some self awareness. I realized by late Thursday afternoon I needed a full and complete STOP. My schedule worked out that it gave me a four day weekend. After going through my emails and tasks, guess what, everything can wait four days. I am taking a break and completely disconnecting. Friday is my errand, shopping day. I spent today, Saturday, in Philly with my Mom and family.  My niece brought her pitbull over for a visit.  He’s ‘s 65lbs and sitting on my lap. I was covered in dog hair when I left.  I will most likely sleep in on Sunday and not sure after that. I would like to go hiking if the weather is cooperative and Monday I am hoping to have lunch with friends. If I am going to thrive in the next crazy year and maintain holistic wellness and balance, I am going to need to find chunks of time like this weekend to completely disconnect from work and focus on the other aspects of my life.  My job isn’t going to love and care for my body and my soul; that’s my job.

love job

One part of me wants to surrender and go back to an easy job.  That is my ego…My ego is being stripped down in this job because every day I have to swim a little harder, learn a little faster, make decisions without a lot of information and then go defend them 🤣 I am way outside of the comfort zone and operating on level higher than I ever imagined I would be operating when I accepted this job.  Thank God my brain is hardwired to be strategic and thank God I strengthened my intuition in recent years because so far, I’ve made good decisions. I also know my limit. I know when a decision is above me.  I am good about building relationships and I am inclusive. I look for the right folks to include or give counsel along the way. Seriously, I talk more in this job than I ever talked in any job. It’s exhausting🤣

One thing is for sure…the ego and emotions have no place in making strategic decisions that will affect my career in the long term. My ego wants to protect me. It wants me to keep doing what I am good at and what is easy with no room for failure but my soul knows I am where I am meant to be – success or failure – it will be my lesson. The key is for me to practice non-attachment to how I think it will play out and just do my best and let it unfold organically.  Whatever happens is for my highest good. Everything is always working out for my highest good even if it works out differently than I expected.

I also reconnected with personal WHY – GROWTH! I wanted potential for long term diversified growth opportunities in my future. I am in the right place for this now. Getting back to my WHY cleared up all the confusion and uncertainity I was having.

What’s your why

Every choice, every decision has a lesson in it. This one is teaching me patience. It’s also teaching me to TRUST to my intuition and use strategic thinking to evaluate choices instead of my ego. I can’t be reactive and emotional with this decision.

What’s You’re Why?  Have you reconnected with it recently?  Sit with yourself long enough to observe if your ego or emotions are driving your decisions. Can you practice non-attachment? Can you consider strategically aligning your choice with what you want in the future rather than reacting to the demands of your ego or attachments of your emotions? Seems to be working for me 😊✨  Ripped-paper-with-written-on-it-Whats-your-why--1024x683

I offer the below Loving Kindness Prayer for the Kurdish people in Syria and all American Armed Forces affected by the actions of POTUS.  He’s golfing while massacres are occurring.  He’s golfing while ISIS is being let free. He’s golfing while US forces are getting hit.  This scares me.  What will the retaliation be?  What demon has he unleashed into the world.  I hope he not only goes down but I hope every Republican supporting him and protecting him goes down with him.  Money and power should never come before human life.

Loving Kindness Prayer💙
May you be safe
May you be healthy
May you be happy
May you be loved

Everything is always working out for my highest good 💙🦋

(C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC – All Rights Reserved

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Self Care Sunday ~ Uncertain Times

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It’s 10:00am on Saturday morning. I am still in my nighty, robe & fuzzy slippers. I am sipping my second cup of coffee in deep thought about life and this crazy job I’ve been in for five weeks now.

During challenging or uncertain times I find it comforting to remember what is meant for me will never miss me and what misses me was not meant for me. It’s comforting to me because it reminds that every experience, good or bad, has a purpose in our lives. It’s up to us to dig within ourselves through introspection to find the meaning or purpose and then use that knowledge to change, grow and adjust.

I’ve been in this new job for five weeks. As far as jobs go, it’s a four alarm fire and I am not even joking when I say that. It has wide political implications and it’s on our industry’s radar. I got my first “inquiry” from the folks who give us money this week 😳 I heard I should expect a lot of them. The external pressure is going to grow as the year goes on. Fortunately for me I’ve only been here five weeks so none of the heat is hitting me right now. My leaders know I am the one trying to put out the fire while navigating political landmines. The reality is the strategic planning and stakeholder engagement work that is needed to stand up this type of program with this type of reach should have been done three to six months ago. They should have secured support and buy-in from their high level counterparts long before I got here. They should have already done a Market Survey or a Public Meeting around the early part of the summer to collect the data I am trying to collect now. Someone dropped this ball on this and they dropped it hard…Now, the problem is valuable time was lost in the schedule so leaders are trying to execute without a solid foundation or stakeholder buy-ins. It’s a hot mess.  I’ve been saying this since the day I got here. They haven’t wanted to hear it and thought I didn’t know what I was doing at first🤣  The good news is legal, contracts and the experts all agree with my assessment and legal in conjunction with contracts has put a stop to things while it’s sorted out which gives me breathing room. I think someone could seriously take a hit on this.  That’s not me being dramatic; it’s me knowing who the external stakeholders are.  It won’t be me who takes the hit.  Staff members at my level rarely bare the burden but trust me the big wigs are strategizing to not catch the blame or own the risk. Some have called it “dog eat dog”; I think it is more like the “Hunger Games” 🤣Seriously, the drama in my last job had nothing on this…🤣🤣

So, how does one work in a situation this volatile? It hasn’t been easy. It’s been one fire drill after another. In a sense, I am a firefighter without water.  Believe me when I tell you, the biggest explosion could still come from external stakeholders unless someone is really good at playing the game. Right now, I am observing how leaders work the politics around this and hoping to learn something from them.

odds

The good news for me is that I’ve received excellent feedback from everyone I’ve work with and they respect my ability to be professional and level headed in difficult situations. That’s the “Relator – or Relationship Builder” in me. But I don’t trust any of them… Not one! It’s just words and bullshit to get me stay. My protection is that I only started five weeks ago and I’ve intentionally demonstrated in multiple briefings that the schedule was blown three months ago. Remember, according to strengthfinders.com, strategic is my #1 strength 🤣 For now, I am just putting my head down and staying focus on my strategic planning and start up action items. It’s the only way to get through the day and stay out of the drama. I’ve also been in contact with my former bosses to pursue other career options just in case it becomes too uncomfortable. I do find comfort in knowing the experts back me up and I’ve already earned the complete support of the my team in just these five short weeks. That either demonstrates that my assessment from day one was right all along or that I have strong leadership abilities. Perhaps it’s both. I would say the style of leadership I try to emulate is “Servant Leadership”.

SERVANT_LEADERSHIP

What I’ve learned about myself in these five weeks is interesting. I’ve learned that I can lead a diverse team on a complicated task. I’ve learned that I can effectively control meetings to stay on topic and keep the meeting productive. I’ve learned I am good at delivering unpleasant information to leaders 🤣This is truly a skill…No joke ✌️ I’ve learned I am intellectually capable of this job. I’ve learned I have the skills and ability to operate at this level. Honestly, I still say the role of a “Senior Advisor” to a leader or leadership team is the right type of role for me and I would be totally up for that type of role instead of this hot mess 🤣 Hmm, wonder if my former GM needs a Senior Advisor with my unique skill set? The most enlightening thing I’ve learned about myself in these five weeks is that I am now better at managing my holistic wellness than I used to be💙I’ve learned that I really don’t give a f**k if I stay in this job. Most importantly, I’ve learned this decision will really come down to me listening to my body and honoring my body’s needs. I am not the same person I used to be. My body is not as strong as it used to be. I need to be focused on protecting my long term health rather than meeting a milestone for someone who doesn’t give a f**k if I get sick in the process. They will replace me with someone who is willing to sacrifice themselves for the mission in short order.  Trust me, they won’t visit me in the hospital if I am down for the count as a result of pushing myself beyond my body’s limits. So, that is where I am right now. Stuck in uncertain times for sure!

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The reason I took this job in the first place is because I could see ten years down the road in it. Ten years down the road I can say I was part of the team who stood this up and I was part of the team that had an impact on the workforce of our industry for years to come. If I can ride out this rough start up and if my leadership can find a way to protect me from the drama, we may be able to work it out. As of today, I just don’t know how to read the situation. I will say – I welcome the Universe to deliver a new opportunity to me that meets my holistic needs. To complicate the situation even more, my GM, who recruited me for this job and who is a personal friend, accepted a job in another organization. She will be leaving in a few weeks. I’ve known this is coming… It’s a good choice for her. The truth is if she didn’t find an exit ramp, she could catch the blame even though it’s really the Exec who dropped the ball by not making a timely decision…By her making the move now, she will be protected if the shit really hits the fan. It does, however, complicate the situation for me. I’m telling you – it’s been non-stop drama everyday and that’s why I am not sure if I have the energy to ride this out even though the long term goal is something I believe in 🤣

success

I am heading to the White House Initiative on Historically Black Colleges & Universities conference in DC this Sunday to Tuesday afternoon.  I am staying at the hotel I like so I can give myself some space from the conference activities. That’s self care. I plan to visit Newseum when I get there tomorrow and then grab dinner somewhere. The President will be at the conference on Tuesday. I am not sure I will still be there when he arrives or speaks 😉

Self Care this week has complicated. I’ve learned a lot about myself and whatever happens with this crazy work situation is fine by me. I am not the same person I used to be.  I now know my holistic wellness and my long term health are more important than a lofty goal or making a name for myself in my career. When I look at the situation this way, perhaps, this all I was supposed to get from his experience…

(C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC ~ All Rights Reserved

Everything is always working out for my highest good💙🦋

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Loving Kindness Prayer
May you be safe
May you be healthy
May you be happy
May you be loved

Self Care Sunday – Burnout and Boundaries

Burnout quoteHave you ever experienced professional burn out? I experienced it in the Fall of 2017. It crept up over time as coworkes and leadership kept crossing my boundaries. I was over-tasked while others were under tasked. I started calling out sick more. I started having health issues and ended up taking almost two weeks off from work too. I eventually made the decision that I needed a full completed stop. I needed a break from the Organization I was working in and I took a one-year temporary assignment to give myself some distance. But it wasn’t the first time I burned out. It’s happened numerous times in my past. I seem to go 100mph. I don’t often see the wall before crashing into it.

Crashing into a wall meme

Here’a little background information on me… I have a wide skill set. I am high performer and a high energy girl. When I am performing optimally, I am a dynamo.  I’m not boasting; just stating facts.  I can take a lot on. I can get a lot done but I also had no boundaries in the past.  Whatever I was asked to do, I did. I often did more than I was asked to do. I did more than anyone was asked to do. The problem with operating like this in the workplace is that you condition managers and colleagues to expect this level of performance from you all the time. It’s hard to break that pattern once you established it and made it your norm.

I recall a few years ago, I had a boss who would often remind me when something wasn’t mine to worry about. He would caution me to stay in my lane.  But I continued to take on too much and worry about things that really weren’t mine to worry about.  He saw what I could not see myself. He often told me to knock it off even though his subordinates were encouraging it. When he was promoted, I lost that external checkpoint and I also did not know how to do it for myself at that time.

Perhaps I didn’t want to admit that I wanted to be a superstar. Maybe I got some sort of validation and approval in being a super woman. Perhaps my ego got a trophy by being a superstar employee who could do anything – all while risking my physical, emotional and spiritual health. Maybe I was a martyr or perhaps felt I was important and indispensable. My self-awareness back then wasn’t evolved to the point that I understood my motives for that behavior.

Self awareness quote

After spending a year studying to be a Board Certified Holistic Health Practitioner, I can now see the danger of my habit. It’s taken some self-awareness to see this in myself and commit to changing it for my long term wellness. I finally learned how to set boundaries and take care of myself. I finally learned to set limits on how much I am willing to give. But let’s remember – boundaries are meaningless unless you enforce them.

I started a new job on April 1st in the same group that burned me out in the past. It was hard choice to return there. But ultimately I knew I changed. I am not the same employee who left 15 months ago. I now know how to take care of myself. Trust me, there’s lots opportunity for me to go above and beyond on this high profile yet struggling team. Just the perfect situation for me to drive 100mph into the wall 😂😂 The only difference now is – I see the danger this time. I see the wall this time. I know the danger of being everyone’s “go to” for everything. It’s not happening this time around! Nope! Not again! Earlier this week I caught myself dropping into my old habit and I stopped myself. I reminded myself to “STAY IN MY LANE”. I logically brought myself back to center and remembered the task wasn’t my responsibility. So I did what I could do to help and then backed off. If it dropped, it dropped. “Let it happen” was in my head. Yes, this time around – it was clear to all involved – I am staying in my lane and everyone will need to adjust. I will need to check-in with myself on a daily basis to ensure I am enforcing my boundaries. In the three weeks I’ve been back, six people have said the same thing to me, “That team needs someone like you!” 😂 I take that as a compliment but it is also my challenge to be sure I exercise self care and maintain my boundaries.

Boundaries

On Thursday, I had a long conversation with a frustrated team member who was considering other options. My observation was he’s close to burnout so I offered to listen to him. Once I popped the top off, he really opened up. He told me his daughter was born a year ago. He was working from the hospital room 10 minutes after she was born. Well, you know I pulled on that thread. I asked him, “Why did you feel you needed to do that? Knowing your managers I do not think they would have expected that of you. So, what’s your why?” Well, the conversation went on for over an hour. By the end of it, I found out he really doesn’t want to leave but he is getting drained. He feels the bar is higher for him, also a high performer, than it is for other employees. He wants a performance plan that has a path to career progression instead of him being stuck in a position as a “go to” just because he’s good at it. When will folks realize smart people are good at many types of work but it doesn’t mean they enjoy it 😉 Wow, talking to him was like talking to myself 😂 We are very much a like😂 By the end of the meeting my new teammate and I decided to have regular check-in meetings with each other. We are more or less going to be accountability partners to ensure we are both staying in our lanes and not taking on too much. I never told him that I am certified coach. Maybe I should start coaching the whole team – Um, stay in your lane, Linda!😂

My coworker did share with me that he felt UNDERVALUED by managers. He was supposed to meet with three managers to discuss his concerns and only one showed up. (That has since been corrected; He’s had conversations this week). He’s had four bosses in two years because of the managerial shuffles; it doesn’t give him confidence in the strategic planning abilities of leadership. I said, “I bet it doesn’t” 😂 This group of managers especially are really good at talking without ever following up with action. #TRUTH! I especially don’t resonate with the energy around the senior management team. I like and respect my team’s senior manager and our front line manager but I am going to keep my distance from the larger group as much as possible. I am staying in my lane! I will only interact with them, when required.

Listening

Here’s my observation about leadership… Human Relations events, ice cream socials and award ceremonies, are just perceived as photo-ops for management unless they are followed up with real authentic conversations with employees. Managers haven’t realized giving an employee 30 minutes of their time and listening attentively is just as important as any management meeting. Employees are stakeholders too! Stakeholder Engagement should include having real authentic conversations with employees; not just posing in fake (staged) photo-ops with them. I can’t seem to get the point across to them that authentic listening is a learned skills that managers should cultivate if they want to truly connect with their employees. Genuinely caring and showing you value the employee as a person is leading from the heart…People resonant with authenticity.

Lead from the heart

Three weeks into a new job on a high profile yet struggling team and so far I like it. I am enjoying the work. All in all this is a good opportunity for me. I can really do some good on this team but, yes, I do still have another offer hanging out there indefinitely. All I have to do it make a phone call. As of right now, I am not pursuing it. It’s still nice to know I have an exit ramp if I need it 😉 😂As I am observing how this team interacts, I am seeing strategic opportunities to improve processes and communications on the team. But honestly, one of the biggest problems the team has is internal communications between team members with different styles and personalities. One key employee has a communication style and responsive issue that is challenging for the rest of the team. However, I am keeping that observation to myself for now. I don’t need to put anyone under the bus in my first month 😂 I think they need more strategic team building exercises and “coaching” along with technical telecoms…Like start a telcon with “Tell me the biggest challenge you are having on this task? What’s keeping you up this week? Can I help?”

ACTION – Reflect on boundaries and leading from the heart 💙

Boundaries are an essential tool in managing holistic wellness. Learning how to set them and enforce them is a skill that will make you strong and resilient. Folks who were used to taking advantage of you, might get pissed off at first. They will adjust. What boundaries have you set for yourself personally and professionally? Have you been enforcing them?

If you are a leader, can you choose to lead from your heart? Perhaps consider starting your next telecom with heartfelt questions instead of diving into your tactical agenda. Give folks an opportunity to speak and be heard FIRST. Giving folks a forum to express their biggest worry or fear and asking if there’s anything you can do to help shows them you are putting them first. Head’s up – the first time you do this, folks may be hesitant to share. You have to make sure they understand it’s a safe room. As for me, I would be suspicious of folks whitewashing and saying everything is “great” all the time. Well, if it’s all so great, what are you doing all day? 😂

If you want to keep employees, you need to show them authentically they are valued and you care about more than just their productivity as a resources. I would rather have an authentic leader who has true authentic human interactions with employees than receive awards or eat ice cream that only give managers photo-ops to show their bosses.

(C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC – All Rights Reserved

Everything is always working out for my highest good 💙🦋

Loving Kindness Prayer💙
May you be safe
May you be healthy
May you be happy
May you be loved
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Self Care Sunday – Trusting the Process

Spiritual meme

The hardest part of change is trusting that you will be ok once everything settles down. It’s hard to have faith that you are making the right choices and doing the right thing when everything is in chaos or feels stressful and icky. But those fearful moments are when it’s essential to TRUST THE PROCESS… Change, big change, requires for things to shift. That shift can feel like an earthquake or just a small tremor. However the shift feels, I am sorry to tell you, discomfort is an essential component of change. Trust the process…

The funny thing is that last paragraph shot out of my fingers in like 30 seconds. It was almost like someone needed to hear that message and spirit was moving through me to deliver it…I know that sounds weird but other folks into spiritual stuff will know what I mean. Whoever needed to hear that message, you will be fine, just fine. Enjoy the ride… You manifested this change for a reason. Trust the Universe is bringing you into alignment with your highest good.

Spiritual meme

The latest development in my career occurred this week when I was asked to give a presentation to executive leadership on why I declined a job offer 😳😂Nothing like being on the hot seat 😂While it was a bit awkward, I was actually very relaxed because I was finally able to speak my truth. The truth has been pushing against my Throat Chakra for months now just waiting to come out😳😂 I had to use all of my spiritual know how to control my mouth. Yep, I am an Aries with Aries Rising. I am a FIRE Sign 🔥 Not always easy to control the flame but I have made a strong effort in recent years to learn to hold my words and use them strategically.

I was very relaxed through the whole briefing because I knew I had documentation to back up my assessment and I also had the support of my organizational leaders. I carefully stepped through my experience. I expressed my gratitude for opportunity before pivoting to explaining that I turned down the job because I no longer enjoyed the work. The challenges and frustrations associated far exceeded any potential for fulfillment in the doing the work. By the end of the meeting they understood it wasn’t an easy choice for me to make but it was the right choice for me considering the situation.

As I spoke, my Director stepped in at times to shape a narrative that turned a negative situation into an opportunity to strategically reposition the organization 👍 She moved her agenda forward by using my situation to illustrate that she needs more funding for STEM related programs! 😂 Seriously, I’ve always respected her but watching her in action was amazing🙌 I walked out of the meeting not only feeling supported but I also felt like a weight was finally off my shoulders. As I walked down the hall with my former boss, he looked over and said, “Now, you know it’s not over yet and you will be hearing from us again, right?” 😂😂😂 I was quick to let him know I am open to all conversations about opportunities to do fulfilling work I enjoy. We will see how this plays out… It’s been a fun ride!

Life is a ride

Well, I need to make a confession… After throwing away twelve pairs of shoes, I went on a shoe buying binge. Some would call it a shopping “bender”👠It led to also buying bras, pants, jackets, sweaters, etc…. Yep, a bender ☺️I think it’s over now. The below image depicts the logic I used to justify my shopping bender 😂

Shoe meme

In case this helps anyone with similar back/hip pain…I recently learned that my hip pain isn’t true hip pain, it’s actually Piriformis Muscle Syndrome and also a tight IT band. In other words, I have a tight butt — but not in a good way😂 The pain can go from my hip down my whole leg. What makes it better?

  • Walking in good shoes that aren’t worn out!
  • Getting Chiropractic Adjustment every two weeks
  • Piriformis stretches twice a day; holding it for 30 seconds each time.
  • If you have low back pain or stiffness, try these stretches to release it. If you are new to stretching, do not push it too far. You want to feel a stretch but not over stretch it and injury yourself. Start slow and small; work yourself up to deeper longer stretches. I do the seated stretch at least four times a day for 30 second holds especially after long walks, sitting or driving long distances. I am starting to work with personal trainer to build strength though my whole body. Strengthening and stretching are really the only ways to stabilize Piriformis muscle group.

    Piriformis Syndrome

    Piriformis

    Piriformis Stretches

    Piriformis Stretches

    One last note, Game of Thrones Season 8 starts tomorrow night. I am so excited. I rewatched all of Season 7 and the last episode of Season 6. I am ready. It’s such a great show. I don’t usually go for fantasy type of shows but this about POWER. It’s about who has power, who wants power and what they will do to get or keep power. I love it. I secretly play Daenerys Targaryen, Dragon Queen(Mother of Dragons) while I am at home watching 😂😂 She is also the sexiest Queen on the show 😉

    Game of Thrones

    (C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC – All Rights Reserved

    Everything is always working out for my highest good 💙🦋

    Loving Kindness Prayer💙
    May you be safe
    May you be healthy
    May you be happy
    May you be loved
    img_0819

    DISCLAIMER: Poetry, views, thoughts,and opinions expressed on this blog belong solely to the author and Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC

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    Finding My Center

    Quotes

    The last year of my life has been about Finding my center again. It’s been about finding my most authetic self after all the superficial stuff fads away. In order to do this, I needed quiet, distance and time just move in my own rhythm. My focus has been on me…no one else. Things got hairy and a little scary at times 😂😂

    Meme

    Friday is the last day of my first week in my new job. This job brought me back to my professional “home”! I am in a new role but surrounded by familiar faces. There’s so much to learn and re-learn. I’ve been gone 14 months. Just enough time for me to be completely out of the organizational rhythm.

    Just a couple of days in and I can say it’s the pace I really like. It’s the pace I missed for the last 14 months. There’s a different pace between a strategic group and a 24 hours operations group. While the slower pace was good at first because it was a break from the grind, the slow pace is one of things that bothered me most. I am an action person. I stay more engaged when I am in a steady flow of activity. My challenge will be to balance my activity so I don’t get burned out again. I need to remember to pull back and remind myself one very important question with each task, “Is this mine to worry about?” I was not always good at this in the past and took on things that really were not mine to worry about! I own that truth!

    The nice thing this time around is I am focused on only one program/system area instead of being generalize and I am also not in a support role. Both were essential requirements for me to rejoin this group. It seems they found the perfect opportunity. Since it’s a new role, I will be involved in developing and maturing it. It is just the kind of challenge that motivates  me. I realized the other day the program I am now working on has 222 in its name. Hmm? 222 is my God Sign number; it’s my favorite number. Of course, that is not coincidence; it’s synchronicity. It’s Universal Flow.
    222
    One of my first observations is that it’s nice to be around so many folks who are so dedicated and focused on working towards a shared goal. In my last role, I was on my own a lot. It’s part of the reason I didn’t enjoy it. I am inspired by the work ethic of some of my coworkers; it helps me rise up and reach for better in myself. I am also happy they all agreed I can stay in the same cubicle – at least for now – we will see down the road. I like where I sit! It’s quiet and out of the spotlight 😂👌

    So how did this happen? How did I end up working in group I thought I left? How did I end up turning down an opportunity I worked for a year to get? Well, these folks got their hooks into me two months ago and slowly reeled me in. Honestly, I seemed to bump into both of my bosses everywhere I went the last few weeks. They kept telling me it was sign 😂Maybe it was… It was annoying but it seemed to work 😂😂

    I was so filled with stress and anxiety about making the right choice I couldn’t think clearly about it. I reached out to a friend for help in getting clarity. He asked one question. “Do you enjoy the work?” (I had been doing prior to making the move). After struggling to answer the question, I realized it was NO. No, I didn’t enjoy the work and admitting that felt like failure to me. Seems crazy but that’s why I did not want to admit it. You know you are growing when you can see your own crazy irrational thoughts and intuitively know it’s time to ask for help! I especially love that it was Blue Love who helped me get the clarity I needed to make this important choice 💙 I am growing and I aim to surround myself with folks who are willing to reconnect with their Center and grow too 😊

    Meme

    (C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC – All Rights Reserved

    Everything is always working out for my highest good 💙🦋

    Loving Kindness Prayer💙
    May you be safe
    May you be healthy
    May you be happy
    May you be loved
    img_0819

    DISCLAIMER: Poetry, views, thoughts,and opinions expressed on this blog belong solely to the author and Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC

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    What’s My WHY

    What’s My Why

    As I sit in professional limbo, I know one thing is for sure…I refuse to make an ego-based or an emotional decision✊

    The ego and emotions have no place in making a strategic decision that will affect my career in the long term. My ego would jump at a promotion as a trophy while my emotions would pull me back to my old group/job because they feel like home. The key is for me to practice non-attachment to any outcome as I explore options and let things play out a little bit longer. I just need to steady my nerves to do this 😂 Whatever is for my highest good will rise up in my soul once I detach my emotions and ego from decision making process. Everything is always working out for my highest good even if it works out differently than I expected.

    Every conversation I’ve had about this just muddied the water for me even more. I was getting myself confused because I never been one to follow external guidance. I now trust my own inner guidance system more for decisions that affect my life. I was in information and emotional overload which was making the choice more complicated.

    Feeling conflicted and confused, I jumped into a hot shower last night. As the hot water pounded on my tight neck & shoulder muscles, I asked myself “What’s My WHY?”

    My WHY is GROWTH. Growth is my word! I want potential for long term diversified growth opportunities in my future. This decision isn’t just about what I want to do today; it’s about how I want to position myself for long term growth in the future. Getting back to my WHY cleared up all the confusion and uncertainity I was having. The choice became clear! By the end of the night, I was relaxed and felt like the heaviness lifted.

    What’s your why

    For now, I need to see how the ball I put into motion plays out first; they advised I they should have a decision within two weeks (if not sooner). There are variables at play and I still feel I did the right thing. I just need to wait and see how it plays out. I also have a preferred contingency plan in place. If that goes sideways too, I still have a job to go back to 😂 It’s all good! I am ok with whatever happens because I know I lived and acted in alignment with my truth and I did what is right for the program I am representing. Wherever I end up, is where I am meant to be 😊

    Every choice, every decision has a lesson in it. This one is teaching me patience. It’s also teaching me to TRUST to my intuition and use strategic thinking to evaluate choices instead of my ego. I can’t be reactive and emotional with this decision.

    After all of that, I slept great last night and had a visitation dream from my deceased sister. She always comes in my dreams when I need reassurance and comfort😇✌️

    If you need to make a big decision in your life, try using strategic logic to help you make the decision. Sit with yourself long enough to observe if your ego or emotions are driving your decisions. Can you practice non-attachment? Can you consider strategically aligning your choice with what you want in the future rather than reacting to the demands of your ego or attachments of your emotions? Seems to be working for me 😊✨

    PS: I am feeling like a Blue Love Poem is brewing… Stop back Friday for a Blue Love note💙😊✨

    Strategy

    As Always – I will be including the Loving Kindness Prayer on every post going forward because I believe love can and will triump over evil. Light will prevail over darkness. I believe we need to put LOVE into the Universe. Love each other…

    Remember to put a little love in the world by saying the Loving Kindness Prayer for someone special. I often like to say it for special people in my life as well for groups such as my family, friends, coworkers and all beings.

    Loving Kindness Prayer💙
    May you be safe
    May you be healthy
    May you be happy
    May you be loved

    I claim love as my vibration for 2019.
    img_0819

    Everything is always working out for my highest good 💙🦋

    (C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC – All Rights Reserved

    DISCLAIMER: Poetry, views, thoughts,and opinions expressed on this blog belong solely to the author and Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC

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    Self Care Sunday – What’s Next

    What’s Next

    What’s Next? Is a question I often ask myself. I am planner and strategic thinker. I am always looking ahead. This Self Care Sunday I am focusing on the career aspect of my holistic wellness and looking forward to what’s next.

    I left work at 4:00pm on December 21st believing I would be out of the office until January 2nd on vacation. I ended up being out of the office for an unexpected 35 day government shutdown. January was a month filled with stress, anxiety and depression. Over one million people including government employees and contractors as well as companies that do business with government were negatively impacted by this ugly shutdown. January 2019 will be a month that won’t soon be forgotten and it will take time to assess the long term impact it had on my workplace.

    I spent all of 2018 working in a role doing outreach for my employer to higher education institutions. January was supposed to be my last month in the role. My official last day in this role is this coming Friday. We lost my whole last month. I am going back on Monday not sure what we are going do. My boss said he would reach out and see if he can extend my assignment so we can have some time to assess things the way we were planning to do in January.

    It’s funny. Before the shutdown, I knew exactly where I wanted to end up. I knew I want to stay in the group I am working with now. Something happened while I’ve been out of work the last five weeks. I started thinking about my old group and the work they do. I started wondering if maybe my talents and skills could be put to use there. I started wondering if there was some way we could work things out. Maybe I could do work I enjoy as well as do work they need. I started wondering if going back there would be for my highest good… I did not see this coming…😂 Yet, for some reason, I am very excited to be totally clueless about my future 😂

    Go with the flow

    If you read my blog regularly, you probably know by now I do not base my career decisions on money. Money may be part of the negotiation but it is not the deciding factor. Extra money doesn’t buy satisfaction, fulfillment or happiness for me. I seem to flourish and enjoy myself the most in roles where I am directly helping someone, impacting someone’s life for the better. I also like strategic work. I like planning and project/program management. I like being out and about; doing stakeholder engagement. I like working with all levels of leadership and I like having freedom. I guess that’s why I’ve been very successful in my current role. I’ve been giving a lot of freedom and have been able to use all the skills/tools in my box with the freedom I enjoy. But the reality is if I really screwed up in this role, the impact would have been minimal. They could afford to give me freedom. In an operations organization, things need to be more conservative because the impact of screwing up could be huge and far reaching. The reigns need to be a little tighter in an operations based organization.

    I can’t honestly say I know what I want to do. I can’t honestly say I have a plan in mind. Not having a plan is completely out of character for me. As I said, I am planner and a strategist. I always have a plan. I am always thinking three moves ahead. As I was thinking about this morning and praying on it, I kept feeling…JUST GO WITH THE FLOW… I know it sounds strange to say to I felt…JUST GO WITH THE FLOW…but for me intuition, intuitive wisdom comes as a feeling rather than something I hear. A thought comes to my mind and it feels intuitively good and right. While asking Angles and Guides for guidance today, the words…JUST GO WITH THE FLOW…kept playing on a loop in my mind and it feels right.

    Go with the flow

    I am going to the flow. I will return to work on Monday without a plan. I will not lobby for one job or another. I will allow the Universe to direct me. I will have faith everything is always working out for my highest good and I will trust my intuition to guide me to the right path. The nice thing about this approach is that I feel very OPEN. I feel open to all opportunities that may manifest for my highest good and also feels good to my intuition. I also feel I am prepared to seize the right opportunity. I feel at peace with this approach. It feels good to let go of directing, controlling and planning. Maybe I’ll stay where I am and pursue a new role with them as they talked to me about in early December. Maybe I’ll go back to a new role in my old group or perhaps God will throw a curve ball and send a whole new opportunity my way. What I know for sure is the official end date in my current role is Friday, February 2nd. I also know any opportunity I accept has to allow me to help others in some way and allow room for growth. That’s all I know.

    Opportunities quote

    ACTION
    The action for this week is reflect on what’s going on in your life. Ask yourself the following questions:

    ✔️ Can I let go?
    ✔️ Is there something I am trying too hard to control?
    ✔️ Am I holding on too tightly to a belief, a person or a job?
    ✔️ Am I trying too hard to hold it all together?
    ✔️ Can I let go?
    ✔️ Can I go with the flow?

    As Always – I will be including the Loving Kindness Prayer on every post going forward because I believe love can and will triump over evil. Light will prevail over darkness. I believe we need to put LOVE into the Universe. Love each other…

    Remember to put a little love in the world by saying the Loving Kindness Prayer for someone special. I often like to say it for special people in my life as well for groups such as my family, friends, coworkers and all beings.

    Loving Kindness Prayer💙
    May you be safe
    May you be healthy
    May you be happy
    May you be loved

    I claim love as my vibration for 2019.
    img_0819

    Everything is always working out for my highest good 💙🦋

    (C) 2018 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC – All Rights Reserved

    DISCLAIMER: Poetry, views, thoughts,and opinions expressed on this blog belong solely to the author and Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC

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    Self Care Sunday – Love is the highest vibration

    Instagrams meme

    Yep, this Self Care Sunday my soul is shinin’ like a MF! 🌟☀️😂😂😂

    I’ve been reflecting on love lately. This Self Care Sunday is about Love. Love of self. Love of others. Unconditional love vs. conditional love. BIG LOVE! LOVE over Fear! Love 💙

    It’s really only been in the last year or so of my life that I’ve learned to truly love and accept myself. It was also this year that I allowed myself to see the high price I paid in my life for not valuing myself and loving myself; I could not open myself up to receive of love. It was easier for me to be the giver than it ever was to receive.

    To receive love, we must open our hearts, expose our souls and be vulnerable to another. Life experiences fractured my trust in others. Without trust there can be no vulnerability. To receive love we must allow another to see the shame we carry from past, feel the anxiety the weighs in our hearts and stand with us in our fear of loss and heartbreak.

    I learned to love myself self by sitting with my pain and feeling it. I grieved for what I lost. I cried for what might have been. I mourned for what was taken away from me and I forgave the person I was in the past for not being strong enough to heal. I gave myself with the same loving kindness I give others. In doing that, I released a burden that really wasn’t completely mine to carry and made space in my heart and my life to receive love.

    Unconditional love, to love without conditions… It is conceptually beautiful but not always easy in practice. Unconditional love doesn’t mean you accept whatever someone offers you and it certainly doesn’t mean you should be a doormat. For me, unconditional love is loving without expectations (strings) of reciprocation or demonstrative proof that I am loved in return. Unconditional love is BIG LOVE.

    Over the last year, I’ve leaned heavy into prayer to help transmute any negative feelings. I’ve been using the Loving Kindness Prayer to pull myself back when I am feeling a bit challenged by love. I find it to be especially effective in helping me send love from a distance to loved ones. By sending loving kindness to a friend, a coworker, a sick relative or even someone who I’ve been at odds with at times helps me to raise my spirits and light my heart with the healing light of love.

    Try using the Loving Kindness prayer by first sending loving kindness to your soulmate or twin flame or anyone who holds special place in your heart and in your life. The exchange of loving kindness through prayer will create synergy and good energy between you. Once you get into the habit of saying this prayer on a daily basis, then start using it for everyone you want to hit with some good energy 🌟 It will lift your spirits when you are down and give you peace when you start to feel anxiety creep up. Sending loving thoughts will also raise your spirit vibration and make your spiritual energy radiant. Love is the highest vibrational force in the Universe.

    Love is the highest vibration

    ACTION: This week’s action is to consider incorporating the Loving Kindness Prayer into your daily activities. Make it a habit.

    Here’s an example of how it works:

    When a strong flash of Blue Love comes into my mind, I often take a moment to send him love 💙😘🔥I visualized him in my mind’s eye, I quietly say his name to myself and then say this prayer:

    May you be safe
    May you be healthy
    May you be happy
    May you be loved

    It’s a beautiful way to send good energy to someone 💙 Do it for 30 days straight and see how you change. Your vibraiton will automatically be lifted by the love you sending out into the Universe.

    Yoga update
    I’ve been doing a 30 minute slow gentle yoga practice at home each night this week. I am going to do this for the next month and build up to getting back into a studio. I am not pushing to my edge; I am taking it slow and using modifications. I am just slowly moving through a practice of Sun Salutations with Chaturanga & Cobra, Warrior I & II, Tree, a twist, wide leg Child’s Pose and Savasana. My foot is sore but is steady in the balance pose, Tree 👍It feels good to get back to yoga. I really do love yoga. I have a gigantic playlist of yoga and mantra music; AyKanna is my FAVORITE 💙 “Longtime Sunshine” is the closing prayer/song/mantra in Kundalini yoga practices. AyKanna’s version is in the YouTube video at the bottom of the post.

    Music Yoga Mantas

    Career Update
    Remember that prayer I posted about my career a few days ago? Remember I asked for a SIGN? Well, it worked quick 😂😂 I received Sign #1 when my boss dropped by my cube early Friday to relay Execs asked him to do whatever he could KEEP ME 😊🦋😂 He asked what I was thinking. We talked for a while about what that would look like; what I wanted and needed. Just for the record, a raise and promotion weren’t at the top of the list. I will certainly negotiate for them as we start to close on this next month but it’s more about doing work I enjoy and working were there are opportunities for someone like me. If I am doing work I enjoy, raises and promotions will flow naturally as a result of me doing my best work. It would be short-sighted to make this about money when it’s actually about fulfillment.

    I spent almost nine years working in an organization doing work I didn’t enjoy. I was able to deal with the lack of career satisfaction for a few years because I worked closely with someone I care about; I enjoyed the years I worked closely with him. I enjoyed taking care of him, helping and supporting him. Once I knew he advanced to the next level permanently, I felt it was time for me to find career satisfaction for myself. I am in a better position to do that where I am. I am now working to the full extent of my skills and abilities and I am fulfilled in the work I am doing. That’s what this is all about.

    Not long after chatting with my boss I bumped in a former coworker in the hallway. As he past me, he stopped me and said, “Linda, Do you have a minute?” He said, “You are in another group now…Is it as chaotic, insane and TOXIC there as it is here?” Yep, he said TOXIC! My answer was, “No, IT IS NOT.” We had an interesting conversation. I don’t know this guy well. We never had a real conversation before. So him stopping me, asking this question and sharing information with me that I didn’t know was my SIGN that nothing has changed. They would use me up and burn me out all over again. This was sign #2. I told him he was my sign from God and an answer to a prayer. He almost cried. Seriously, his eyes welled up 😊He told me he was a Christian and believes in signs from God too 😇 Yep, that career prayer was answered in two days, with two signs within two hours. 222 Prayers work 🙂

    222

    Everything is always working out for my highest good 💙🦋

    (C) 2018 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC – All Rights Reserved

    DISCLAIMER: Poetry, views, thoughts,and opinions expressed on this blog belong solely to the author and Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC

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