Self Care Sunday – Being A Balanced Introvert

Archangel Raphael

I’ve had a busy week. I had commitments every night after work which means no time to write. Today, which is Saturday, was the first day I was able to relax and daydream a bit.

day dream

I walked five miles this morning because my body always feels better when I move. I also enjoy walking around town and seeing what’s going on in the neighborhood. I love to walk because I feel lighter after I shake off the old stagnant stressful energy I often absorb from others during the week. Walking is cleansing for me.

After I walked five miles, I went my local coffee shop for an iced coffee. A group of multi-cultural kids around ten years old were at the table next to me playing Chess♟ It was really cool to watch young kids mixed nationalities, girls and boys, taking turns playing the winner at Chess. I don’t even know how to play Chess🤣 That’s why I love Ventnor Coffee in Ventnor, NJ. It’s a local coffee shop with eclectic people. It has a very warm small town vibe. Check it out if you are in town. After my iced coffee watching the Chess game, I spent most of the afternoon at pool reading magazines and listen to music.

I tend to lean towards being an Introvert. I could go days – seriously DAYS – without needing or wanting to speak to anyone. However, I do try to remember to call my 80 year old mother even when I am in hermit mode so I can be sure she is ok. But, I am completely comfortable in my own company. I enjoy solitude. Silence is beautiful…Shhh

INFJ

One of reasons I’ve become more introverted in recent years is that I hate small talk. Small talk feels like poking myself in the eye 🤣In recent years, I started honoring my need for authentic interactions instead of engaging in small talk. The truth is I would rather talk to fewer people and truly connect with someone on a deeper level than interact with more people on a surface level. Another reason I’ve become more introverted is that my intuition (my internal bullshit detector) has strengthened. I’ve learned to protect myself a bit from being to too empathetic with people. I am sensitive to the emotional well-being of others and sometimes it can be draining for me.  But the biggest reason I am more introverted these days is because I am finally comfortable in my own skin. I no longer need to fill the quiet moments with noise. I no longer need acceptance or validation from anyone. I am completely and authentically comfortable with who I am now. I don’t need noise to distract me anymore.

Yes, I am enjoy my alone time but too much alone time isn’t healthy for anyone. As part of my self care, I’ve been opening myself up to more social activities in recent weeks. I’ve been working to find the right balance of activities that afford me opportunities to socialize comfortably while also maintaining proper boundaries.

Speaking of socializing…I attended a friend’s husband’s funeral on Thursday. I went to the services and spent three hours with friends at the luncheon but I opted to come home after the luncheon instead of going back to my friend’s house. When she asked me why I wasn’t coming back to the house, I said, “Are you kidding? I’ve talked more today that I have in a week. My jaw hurts.” The other reason I left is…that group of friends are hard core Fox News Watching Republicans😳 Well, folks who read my blog know I am an immigrant loving liberal democrat✌️My great grandmother was an immigrant from Mexico; what’s happening at the USA/Mexico border to migrants is stressing me out and making me sick to my stomach. While most folks were well behaved on Thursday, I wanted to leave before they all got too drunk and started picking fights with me. I am trying to open myself up a bit and socialize more but it is also essential I take care of myself by honoring my need to withdraw once I’ve reached my social limit.

empaths

Other news from this week is…I am still waiting on the paperwork for my new job to finalize. While it’s all approved by Management, Human Resources had to revisit my Security Clearance for the new gig. That takes time. Hopefully, it should be done soon. On another note, I am looking forward to reconnecting with Blue Love in the future🥰 He is always in my thoughts. I 💙 his pretty blue eyes😍🔥

If you need Angelic Support this week, Archangel Raphael is a great healer 😇

(C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC ~ All Rights Reserved

Everything is always working out for my highest good💙🦋

Protected by Copyscape Online Copyright Search
DMCA.com Protection Status

Loving Kindness Prayer
May you be safe
May you be healthy
May you be happy
May you be loved

Self Care Sunday ~ Spontaneous Movement

swimmer

I wanted this Self Care Sunday post to be about movement and importance of exercise to the body, mind and spirit but I am having trouble writing. Some days the words just don’t flow smoothly. Today is one of those days.

I will start with it’s Saturday and I’ve been off from work for three days. I’ve been up early each day. I am active so I’ve walked four or five miles each day and swam each day too. While I’ve been invited to barbecues off-shore, I’ve had no interest in leaving the island for parties. I’ve socialized enough. As an introvert, I don’t really need a lot of social activity. It’s been a really nice weekend. While I’ve had a lot of exercise this weekend, I’ve also enjoyed just going with the flow and not having any obligations. It’s been nice not having a plan and just making spontaneous decisions.

spontaneous living

I will say I am now tired and have a bit of a sinus headache. I was up doing laundry at 5:00am. That’s an early start for a weekend. I was in the cafe up the street eating breakfast with a neighbor by 7:30am. I walked three miles before 9:00am and finished a 60 minutes water aerobics class by 11:30am. After water aerobics, I rested poolside for an hour but eventually ended up in my favorite local coffee shop, #ventnorcoffee, with my MacBook for Iced Coffee by 1:00pm. I got home around 3:00pm and a storm is rolling by as I type this blog. See the below photos from my living room window. The thunder and lightening just started on the beach. The first photo was taken just before the storm started.  The second photo was taken during the storm.

storm in ACNJ

during storm Acnj

I am tired but it’s a good kind of tired. It’s the kind of tired you feel after you worked out. It’s the kind of tired you feel after you had a busy day. It’s the kind of tired you feel after a whole day on the beach. It’s the kind of tired you feel after swimming all day. It’s the kind of tired you feel after moving your body. My body feels better when I move – so I move. I’ve had a lot of sun the last three days and I already have a great tan.

As of right now, I am planning Sunday to be a complete and total rest day. I am not planning to walk, swim or work out. I may end up lounging in my Chemise Set (nighty & robe) and fuzzy slippers all day if that is what my body calls me do. I guess I will see how I feel when I wake up.  Maybe check  back later on Sunday.  There’s a good chance I may write more tomorrow afternoon.

Midnight Red - C.M. Cooper

Midnight Red – C.M. Cooper

How are you taking care of yourself today? Does your body need movement or rest today? Do you like not having a plan and living spontaneous?

(C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC ~ All Rights Reserved

Everything is always working out for my highest good💙🦋

Protected by Copyscape Online Copyright Search
DMCA.com Protection Status

Loving Kindness Prayer
May you be safe
May you be healthy
May you be happy
May you be loved

Self Care Sunday ~ The Long Game

images about change

This past week has somewhat been about repositioning myself for the Long Game.  

I started my book writing course on Monday.  This will be a huge project. I am not completely sure I am ready for it. That’s why this six month course is good because it gradually builds each week and is opening my awareness to different ways to approach it.  It helps to take one bite at a time and build up momentum.  I am a little ahead of some folks because I’ve been writing regularly for ten years.  For me, it will be more about focusing on having the discipline to write on specific topics and setting a schedule rather than being free form.  I think there is good a shot I will be going thorough old blogs to pull text and content as I move forward.  

Have you taken on any big projects lately? How are you managing it?  

To move forward with my book writing project, I had to change some stuff.  First, books are normally turned into publishers in Word Documents.  I’ve been using an Apple iPad Pro tablet with wireless keyboard for the last two years. It does not have Word. It is also difficult to update my website with the touch screen and the wireless keyboard constantly switches modes as I type.  I came to acceptance that I need an actual laptop with Microsoft Office but I am also an Apply Loyalist.  On Friday, I traded in my Apple iPad Pro for this pretty Rose Gold Apple MacBook Air 13″ with Microsoft Office. It’s an adjustment but it has a lot more functionality than I had with the iPad Pro. I was recently able to reduce my cell phone bill by $100/month so I felt comfortable financing the balance for 12 months rather than using my cash. Also, I need to conserve cash in case there is a government shutdown in October 🤣

MacBook Air Rose Gold

I will eventually start using my this website to discuss my book.  With this in mind, I decided I need to remove my personal politics from this website. If you read my blog regularly, you know I am Democrat. The current Administration is pushing me further left.  You also know I have my Twitter feed in the right side bar.  Since 2017, my Twitter account has been taken over by my rage at the current Administration and it doesn’t belong on this blog anymore. Removing it from this site will also protect me professionally – in my day job – just in case someone finds this site. I want this site to be focused on writing, leadership and holistic wellness. With that in mind, I set up another Twitter account to go with this blog; it will feature topics such as holistic wellness, leadership, self care, personal growth and spiritual awakening.  That twitter account is now in the right side bar.  If you want to follow my rage against the Administration Twitter account, you will need to do so on Twitter by following @HighestGoodLife.  

How are you positioning yourself for future?

On the Career front, I am in the running for three different promotions. One of them really interests me – dare I say, excites me.  I am not used to saying the word “excited” when talking about my career with this “company” but this particular opportunity is EXCITING.  I can’t really say the details yet but I did have a couple of meetings this week.  It’s looking highly likely it will happen but nothing is buttoned up yet. The hiring manager had to work on some logistics. Here a truth about me not everyone knows – I am all about the LONG GAME – meaning I am strategic. I am willing to take a set back, a loss and make sacrifices along the way to ultimately win in the long run. It seems taking a step back and letting things play out a bit worked out for my benefit in this situation.  Sometimes to win the BIG game, you have take small loses and setbacks as well as have the patience to let things play out in Divine Timing.   

Do you play the Long Game?  Can you be patient and trust that things will bloom in the future?

Long Game QUOTE

This week I had the opportunity to be brave and vulnerable with someone I care about.  I almost chickened out but after giving it a lot of thought and listening to my intuition, I knew it was the right thing to do – for both of us.  In the past, I would internalize my feelings and make myself sick. Even worse, I would do things that put me in potentially awkward/uncomfortable situations and I often ended up regretting it.  I won’t do it anymore – not even for him.  That’s not good self care. However, I care very much for him and it was important to me that he understood my “why”.  To ensure I was authentic with him, I had to be vulnerable and show him my truth.  There was no other way. If nothing else, he saw I will also be honest and truthful with him. That is authenticity.  It felt good be vulnerable with him and I do trust him with my vulnerability. I was proud of myself for having the courage to do it. I was also thankful for his understanding response.  I really am just trying to practice good self care and also honor him by protecting him and our wonderful “connection”. 

When was the last time you were vulnerable and showed your authentic self to someone you love?


memes about changes

Physically, I am having some challenges this week.  I’ve been so dang tired all week long.  My ears are constantly filled up – probably by allergies. I did go to the doc and he told me it’s not infection but told me to take Mucinex, Flonase and Sudafed until to breaks up.  It’s wearing me out.  I also have been cold and have had some muscle pains this week and I found out I still have a Vitamin D deficiency so I had to increase my daily intake to 5,000 for three months and get retested.  I am writing this on Saturday morning and will be planning to stay home all day in warm slippers, comfy clothes, a blanket, movies and with my new laptop all day.  I am not going anywhere today – even if it is a beach day. I just can’t do it today.  It’s all about rest and physical self care.  Sometime we have to adjust our lifestyle to take care of ourselves.

Are you willing adjust your lifestyle to be healthy and practice Self Care?

health meme

(C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC – All Rights Reserved

Everything is always working out for my highest good 💙🦋

Loving Kindness Prayer💙
May you be safe
May you be healthy
May you be happy
May you be loved
img_0819

DISCLAIMER: Poetry, views, thoughts,and opinions expressed on this blog belong solely to the author and Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC

Protected by Copyscape Online Copyright Search

DMCA.com Protection Status

Self Care Sunday – Finding Yourself is Remembering Yourself

Finding yourself quote

The intention of my Self Care Sunday posts is to shine a light on a path of self-discovery for the readers. I hope readers are inspired to reflect on the topics I discuss and use those reflections for self-exploration.

I believe self-exploration, self-knowledge, is the key to finding true inner peace, contentment and happiness.  I believe living in authenticity (truth) and being honest about your needs, wants and desires is a powerful change agent and can spark personal and spiritual growth. Self-Knowledge grounds us in our authentic personal power.

But how does anyone really understand their self and explore their own path to inner peace, contentment and happiness if they are always surrounded by “noise”? How can we tune into our inner wisdom if we are blinded by external expectations, duties, obligations and perhaps even a little afraid to change? So many of us walk around unfulfilled because we are living someone else’s truth or we are living in our past glory instead of embracing reality as it is today. Things change, people change, relationships change and so must we surrender to the truth and change. It’s been my experience, we keep ourselves busy, we stay in constant motion, so we don’t have time to look or feel the sticky uncomfortableness of our discontentment. Believe me I’ve been there. The below meme accurately depicts me trying to block out the truth in my life 😂 #NotTodayBitch

Not today bitch quote

In my experience, I only started to hear my own inner voice when I separated myself from the noise that surrounded me. It was in the quiet moments my intuition spoke to me. My inner voice started speaking so loud that I could no longer ignore it. I knew I had to change my life no matter how much it cost me. I was choosing to walk the path to happiness even it meant I lost everything or everyone in my life. I just couldn’t live like that anymore. I just didn’t give a crap anymore. I was going to be happy!

Once I let go, I could see I was walking around half alive but mostly unfulfilled everywhere; that was no way to go through life. Once I broke free I could clearly see that I was unfulfilled and unhappy because I let my duty and obligations to family, jobs and other relationships override my relationship with myself. I didn’t honor our own needs, wants and desires. Heck, I didn’t know what my needs, wants and desires were at that time. I had to give myself time and space to sit with the sticky discontentment in my life and listen to my soul’s guidance to figure it all out. I finally saw that I was living out of alignment with my truth most of life. I can tell you for sure no one has ever found fulfillment living out of alignment of their truth.

I since learned how to honor my needs, wants and desires. I’ve learned how to take care of myself holistically. I’ve learned I am a powerful creator but mostly I’ve learned who I truly am after I wipe off the mask I wear every day. I can honestly say I love and accept myself now. I am authentically Linda now and that level of self-awareness is true authentic personal power.

Authenticity quote

At this time, I encourage you to take some time to focus only on yourself. Not matter what anyone tells you, honoring your needs is not selfish. Folks my judge you; they may say you’ve changed. They won’t be able to manipulate you anymore once you see the truth. That’s good. You are allowed to change. I encourage you to fill your cup up first, then pour from your full cup to help others.

I give you permission to rest, heal, try new things and disconnect from the world if you need to for a while. I encourage you to set boundaries, distance yourself from unhealthy relationships, embrace new beginnings and ground yourself in self-knowledge. I say to you LOVE yourself as much as you love others. LOVE yourself unconditionally. Instead of finding yourself, I encourage you to remember who you were before duties, obligations and expectations told who to be.

Over the next few days, I’d like you to reflect upon these questions:

How can I love myself today? How can I honor my needs, wants and desires TODAY?

Then allow yourself the space to hear the answers from within. Let your authentic self speak to you in the quiet moments.  Tune into your inner wisdom.

All of your answers are within you!

I honor those of you who are brave enough to live authentically and allow yourself to see the truth in your life. I honor those of you who are courageously letting go of all you’ve known for most of your life to explore new paths to happiness.  I honor those, like me, who chose to answer the call to “wake up” to the truth in your life. I honor, celebrate and wish all of you brave individuals the ride of a lifetime as you reach for your highest good.

——-

As for what’s going on with me, I start a Book Writing course on Monday and I am still working through interview process for two different promotions at work. I will share that a potential 3rd option was presented to me on Thursday 😂👏👏It is so gigantic and exciting that I shouted “SHUT UP! O-M-G!” while talking to a GM on the phone. She was cracking up! Folks down the hall heard me and laughed. They had no idea why I was so excited – I can’t tell anyone the details yet – but trust me – if the 3rd option happens, it will be a dream come true for me. It will mean the seeds of a vision I planted last year while on a temporary assignment bloomed. Wish me luck because this would not only blow the other two opportunities out of the water but it will also make the decision process a heck of a lot easier for me. I should know for sure next week🤞The Universe is AMAZING! #Grateful

One last note about embracing change – I walked into the hair salon on Friday to get my greys and dark chocolate roots touched up but I unexpectedly walked out a GINGER 😂 I was told it suits my firey and passionate personality 🔥😂 I may delete the photo in a week or two to protect my privacy but I did want to share that somehow I became a redhead without really planning to do so and it’s all good 😂🔥✌️#GingersDoItBetter 🔥😂💙

Ginger hair color

(C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC – All Rights Reserved

Everything is always working out for my highest good 💙🦋

Loving Kindness Prayer💙
May you be safe
May you be healthy
May you be happy
May you be loved
img_0819

DISCLAIMER: Poetry, views, thoughts,and opinions expressed on this blog belong solely to the author and Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC

Protected by Copyscape Online Copyright Search

DMCA.com Protection Status

Self Care Sunday – Reflection On Growth

Holistic Wellness quotesI enjoy writing these Self Care Sunday posts about Holistic wellness. I like exploring the balance of body, mind & spirit including personal and spiritual growth. I also enjoy writing these post because I’ve been through some shit in my life. If what I’ve learned and experienced is beneficial to others, than my suffering was for a higher purpose. I hope you, the reader, can reflect on how I manage my holistic wellness and look for ways to find that balance in your own life. My intention is to offer points of reflection for you. To be clear, I do not intend my posts to be “advice”. The ultimate goal of every Self Care Sunday post I write is to encourage you to find your own truth. My truth is not your truth. I hope to inspire you to fearlessly dive into your own soul and find your authentic truth and power. I hope to encourage you to trust their own intuition. No one knows you better than you know yourself. I don’t have your answers. All the answers you need are within you. I am just here writing these posts to help shine the light towards the path of self discovery for you. Take what resonants with you from my posts; leave what doesn’t.

Intuition quote

I’ve had a few experiences this week that gave me an opportunity to pause to be proud of myself and my growth in recent years. First, I had a check-up with my Cardiologist. I have a congenital arrhythmia that is monitored because every once in while it goes haywire. The last time I was completely out of rhythm was 2010. I ended up at the hospital soaking wet with sweat and a heart rate circling from 150bpm down to under 40bpm all day long. I also found out then I had a Fatty Liver. I walked out of the hospital with two heart medicines, a 21 day heart monitor and an appointment with a Liver Specialist. Well, the Liver Specialist really kept things real – brutal almost 😂 He told me that unless I made some hard choices, that I would not live to be 50 years old. It took me another year to surrender but I eventually let go and made a choice to change my life.

On Monday, my Cardiologist told me I’ve officially kept off 45 pounds for 7 years. I don’t smoke or drink. My blood work is perfect. My liver is completely healed. (I can tolerate a glass of red wine once in while 😉). My Cardiac Risk Assessment went from HIGHLY likely to have a heart attack or stroke to almost NO RISK. It is now under 2%. My Cardiologist told me he can’t even see my arrhythmia on my EKG anymore. Let that sink in… the arrhythmia I was born with is no longer visible on my EKG ✨♥️ It’s completely gone. My heart rhythm is completely normal. He congratulated me on being a rare patient whose risk has gone down instead of up as I aged into my 50s. It’s all because I took control of my habits, my life and my health. I am very proud of myself 😊💙 ✨If you want to do your own Cardiac Risk Assessment, follow the link to American College of Cardiologist Risk Assessment Site.

ACC Cardiac Risk Tool

http://tools.acc.org/ASCVD-Risk-Estimator-Plus/#!/calculate/estimate/

The second reason I am proud of myself is that I found out last week I made the selection “lists” for both of the promotions I applied for earlier in the month. I already had one unofficial conversation; it looks pretty promising that I could be staying in my current organization with a promotion. I have an interesting spiritual take on this. If I get the promotion in my current organization, I will be working for the same manager I felt held me back from promotions a few years ago. Spiritually it’s like going back to that group and working for her again will close that Karmic loop. It will make things right spiritually between us – a growth cycle will be completed for both of us. That feels like the right choice for me. I am also really happy and proud of myself that I chose the do the 14 month temporary assignment I did last year. People doubted my intentions for doing it. People kept asking if I was sure and wondering if I was making the right choice leaving the organization for that long. I always knew in my heart it was the right choice for me AT THAT TIME. I am proud of myself for listening to my own wisdom and trusting my own intuition. That experience was very beneficial to my personal and professional growth.

As I’ve grow personally and spiritually, I’ve become more open to seeing things differently. Having this new awareness and clarity in life is both wonderful and terrifying at the same time. Seeing truth that is in direct contradiction to what I’ve been trying to tell myself for years is stressful but is also the most transformative experience I’ve ever had. Often the truth of what we’ve accepted and settled in our lives hurts but it is also sitting with that pain and living in that truth that gives us the ability to break paradigms in our life. It gives us the ability to become limitless in our ability to grow into better versions of ourself. When our awareness is opened and we start living in truth, our whole life changes; it has to change because the foundation of who we are internally shifted.

I’ve learned the longer we “hang in there” and resist the signs of change in our lives, the more stressful transitions will be. We may even miss opportunities the Universe has been laying before us because we are resisting instead of surrendering to change. I’ve learned it’s good to reflect on the past to glean wisdom and learn lessons but it’s not good to dwell too long on mistakes or missed opportunities. Ultimately, every experience we have contributes to making us into who we are today. Instead of being filled with regret from the past, focus that energy on creating something new today. You are always exactly where you are meant to be.

Divine Timing quote

I have had to let go of a lot in my life. I’ve said a lot of goodbyes to people I’ve loved. It has been on my mind a lot this week because Blue Love is transitioning to a new chapter of his life in the next month. I am extremely happy and excited for him. In my mind, I am hoping it’s not “good-bye” for us, I hope it’s “see you down road!” This is how I know I’ve grown in the last two years… Instead of holding on too tight to him out of attachment, I want him to be free out of love. I hope he takes time to rest, enjoy life and find his own truth. I want this for him because I truly love him. I love him unconditionally. I want him to be the fullest expression of God’s perfect love that he was intended to be.

Blue Love Haiku #1

My wish for Blue Love is that he is safe, happy, health and, most importantly, loved. I want him to be LOVED.
Blue Love Haiku #9

If you all learn one thing from me, it is – you are always exactly where you are meant to be. Every experience you have, every choice and mistake, made you who you are today. You are a reflection of God’s love created to shine – shine like the sun. If you didn’t have all of those experiences, you may not be the person you are today. If you didn’t make those choices, you may not have awakened to your authentic truth. Everything happens in divine timing and every experience we have is all part of God’s plan for us to be our authentic selves. But, only if you allow it. Only if you let go and just go for the ride the Universe is offering you. Trust it will always be just fine – just fine.

I hope you choose to stand in your own power by knowing who you are and by finding what lights your soul up. Take time to honor your needs. Take time to heal and rest. Most importantly, honor your truth and enjoy the ride!

Change quotes

(C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC – All Rights Reserved

Everything is always working out for my highest good 💙🦋

Loving Kindness Prayer💙
May you be safe
May you be healthy
May you be happy
May you be loved
img_0819

DISCLAIMER: Poetry, views, thoughts,and opinions expressed on this blog belong solely to the author and Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC

Protected by Copyscape Online Copyright Search

DMCA.com Protection Status

Self Care Sunday May 19, 2019 – Part 2

Love is the answer quote

This is my May 19, 2019 Self Care Sunday Part 2. When I wrote Part I, I was not feeling inspired to write about any particular Self Care topic. After taking a long walk this morning and thinking about relationships a lot while I walked, I decided to write this Part II. So, when you get done reading this post about relationships, please scroll down and read Part I too 🙂

Having healthy relationships is considered to be a key component in practicing good Self Care. Honestly, I was bad at maintaining healthy relationships in years past. In years past, did not maintain or enforce proper boundaries. I was a giver to my own detriment. I allowed folks to take advantage of my loyalties. I assumed everyone would respect me and I naively believed love was the answer for all problems.

Massive changes swept though my life a few years ago. While I was spiraling through them, I was trying to keep all of my relationships status quo. Until the day I realized, my relationships were contributing to the problem. It wasn’t easy to step back and see what I accepted in life. It wasn’t easy to distance myself from unfulfilling relationships in my life. It wasn’t easy to choose me instead of them. It wasn’t easy but that critical act of self care, completely changed me and my life. I became stronger once I saw the truth in my life. The quality of all of my relationships greatly improved once I started exercising good self care in all interactions.

I can’t write about relationships without writing about my relationships with men in my life. At this time, I will give a warning that I am about to be really vulnerable and reveal the truth of who I am. I do so without fear or shame. I do so because it’s essential for me to live in authenticity.

Relationship with self

I am 100% heterosexual. I like men. I enjoy men. I am wildly attracted to Blue Love because of his boy next door down to earth demeanor. I also seem to be wildly drawn to the bright blue eyes and grey hair combo. But, the truth is I haven’t been very good in my relationships with men throughout my life mostly because I never learned how to do it.

My father died when I was seven. My mother was widowed at 36 years old with five kids and never remarried because she was so heartbroken. A male member of family abused me. I didn’t date in high school. I was pretty and popular in high school but I was also very reserved. I didn’t really let many people into my world. While many of my friends were losing their virginity, I waited until I was 21. I lost it to a narcissist. It took me years to break free from him. He attempted to make amends with me and rekindle our relationship 20 years ago but that day was the last day I spoke to him. I asked him to not contact me again and he’s respected that request.

My sister’s death in 1999 broke me in a way I can’t really explain. I spiraled through depression and reckless behaviors. I was in one casual relationship after another until about 2007. There was a man who was 17 years older than I am. I knew him socially. I will call him “Tom” but that’s not his real name. Well, “Tom” and I were wildly attracted to each other. I am still attracted to him. I truly believe we were soul mates. We were not the kind of soul mates that end up spending their lives together. We were the kind of soul mates that came into each other’s lives to help each other grow. The below quote from Elizabeth Gilbert explains how “Tom” and I were soul mates.
Elizabeth Gilbert Soul Mates

All I can really say is what happened between “Tom” and I wasn’t pretty. It was painful for both of us. I truly believe “Tom” loves me even today but he understood something that I wasn’t ready to see or accept until 2011…He knew we were on different speeds in life and love just wasn’t enough for our relationship to be successful. We wanted different things. And, well, I am a strong willed female and he’s an old school guy who likes to call the shots. That’s a recipe for dynamite between a man and women. We are both stubborn. It became a battle of the wills and both of us lost. We ended UGLY! It ended in a very pubic explosion between us. I haven’t spoke to him since I walked out that day on September 15, 2011.

I last saw “Tom” at my best friend’s funeral last year but I chose to maintain a distance. I didn’t speak to him or even go anywhere near him mostly because I don’t need to relive that drama. When it’s done, it’s done! But here’s the thing about “Tom”. It was because of “Tom” that I let go of the life I used to have. It’s because of “Tom” that I learned to see myself, love myself and accept myself. It’s because of “Tom” that I have the life I have today. While I have no desire to talk to “Tom” or have him in my life today, I will always love him and be grateful to him for helping me grow. Perhaps that was his purpose in my life. He was sent to me to help me grow. That’s why I think he was a soul mate.

In recent years, I’ve take a time out from relationships mostly because I needed to work on myself. I wanted to look at my life. I wanted to decided what I want. I wanted to ground myself in authenticity as Linda without anyone else to worry about.

Relationship self care

As I reflect on relationships, I know one thing to be true now. I am growth oriented. I will always need to grow in all aspects of my life. I may be 52 but that certainly doesn’t mean that I will be slowing down. I fully plan to take risks, try new things, learn new stuff and grow personally, professionally and spiritually until I take my last breath. Any man who chooses to be in my life as my partner now must be willing to approach life this way. And, in return, I will support and help him achieve his wildest aspirations. I will help him reach for the next level. I will help him strategize his next move. I will be his motivation when he is feeling uninspired. I will be the voice in his ear saying “I love you. You got this!”

There is one thing I know now for sure about relationships. “Tom” taught me that in a relationship both individuals must want to live life on the same speeds. One person can’t be growing while the other is standing still. It won’t work and it will be unfulfilling for both. I also need a guy who knows I am his equal. I am his match. While I like to be a submissive and uninhibited in the bedroom, outside of the bedroom I expect respect and to be treated as an equal. I also tend to be a direct communicator. I need to be able to respectfully say what I need to say. I don’t mind fighting. I am #DTF – that could mean Down To Fight or Down To F$*K depending on the situation. 😂🔥💙 I don’t mind going a few rounds just to air something out as long as we respect each other’s boundaries. If you act like an ass, you shall be called out for acting like an ass. But neither should hit below the belt and no fighting in public – PERIOD! I will not walk on rice paper for anyone anymore.

I really don’t need much to make me happy in a relationship. I need someone who is willing to grow, who treats me with respect as an equal, who enjoys sparing; doesn’t mind a woman who challenges him by keeping things real with honesty and truth. Most importantly, I need and want love in my relationships. I am not interested in companionship. I am perfectly fine being single. I enjoy my own company. I am not lonely. I do not need company just for the sake of not being alone. So, any man who wants to be in my life better be prepared to give and share affection – LOVE. He will be loved, hugged and adored and must love me in return. At the end of the day, I do still believe love is the answer for all problems.

(C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC – All Rights Reserved

Everything is always working out for my highest good 💙🦋

Loving Kindness Prayer💙
May you be safe
May you be healthy
May you be happy
May you be loved
img_0819

DISCLAIMER: Poetry, views, thoughts,and opinions expressed on this blog belong solely to the author and Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC

Protected by Copyscape Online Copyright Search

DMCA.com Protection Status

#DearMeTenYearsAgo

Letter writing

This Self Care Sunday post was inspired by a hashtag trending on Twitter #DearMeTenYearsAgo.

My spiritual or personal awakening actually started ten years ago in 2009 after I watched “The Secret” https://www.thesecret.tv for the first time. There was something about that afternoon; I knew that movie changed me. I could feel the grid shifting I watched it. It planted a seed in me. I remember my mind was open for the first time to the Law of Attraction and the to the notion that thoughts become things. It was the first time I allowed myself to believe I could live a life bigger and more fulfilling than the one I was living. It was a powerful moment in my life.

The problem was – I wasn’t ready for that kind of self-revelation in 2009. I wasn’t ready to really see myself yet. I wasn’t ready to let go of unhealthy habits, relationships and friendships. I wasn’t ready to change. I wasn’t ready to be that powerful so I continued being small. By continuing to live small and not honor the new wisdom starting to rise within I was living out of alignment with the calling in my soul. I knew I was not centered. I felt it. Honestly, I didn’t want to hear the voice within. I numbed myself with alcohol and partied non-stop to drown it out but I still heard it in the middle of the night. I still heard it when I was alone… I still heard it as one unfulfilling experience rolled into another… The pressure within me was building. I started getting stressed out and depressed.

The hardest part of personal and spiritual growth is that your perspective changes. It’s very hard to continue as if everything is the same when you now see, feel and experience things completely differently than the folks you surround yourself within every day. The longer you fight it, the worst it gets. It’s almost as if it taps you on shoulder but you don’t listen. It taps you on the shoulder again and you still don’t listen and then one day it knocks you the fuck out with the truth just so you wake up. Believe me – that hurts! 😂 The truth of who we are and what we’ve settled for in our lives is very hard to see up close. I chose to see it in anyway. I used the pain to grow and change.

Knock out gif

But before I grew and change – I became sick from the stress of the events. I won’t get into the long series of events that eventually pushed me to let go of a relationship, friendships, a lifestyle, a way of thinking and small-mindedness. All I will say – it wasn’t pretty. I see now it didn’t need to be that hard. If I just would have let go sooner I could have saved myself a lot of heartache, pain and sickness.

Here’s my rhetorical question… If I didn’t go through the heartache, pain, sickness and all of those changes, would I be the woman I am today? Was it the struggle the defined my character and shaped me into who I am today. I like the woman I’ve become. I like the woman I’ve grown into. I know I am a powerful creator. I now know my worth. I am not afraid to see myself. I enjoy self-awareness. I now won’t accept less than I deserve from anyone including myself 💙✨✊

#DearMeTenYearsAgo – I would not go back and change anything ten years ago unless I would end up the same strong, passionate, compassionate and beautiful women I am today. If the struggle made me who I am today, I will take the struggle – heartache, pain, tears and sickness – I will take it all just to be sure I end up the same woman I am today💙✨✊

Food for thought

If you are starting to experience things differently now and are getting yourself stressed out by change on the horizon, my advice to you is to just follow the signs. Follow one sign at time without looking to far ahead. Make one choice at a time. Eventually you will hit a tipping point as I did and then you won’t look back. I would also suggest surrendering to the process before I did. It’s very hard to know you are changed and are different on the inside then have to put on a mask to pretend you are still the same person to the folks in your life. I would also suggest you be careful who share confidences with now. I learned the hard way not every person in your life will be happy you are changing. Some will be envious. Some will judge you. Some will try to manipulate you just as they have done in the past. Some will try to hold you back. You changing will make them see themselves.

If you need support, confide in someone who has been through it (a kindred spirit). If I know you personally, please feel free to reach out to me for support. Peacefully start following the signs God and Universe are laying out for you. You will find your way.

Follow the signs quote`

(C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC – All Rights Reserved

Everything is always working out for my highest good 💙🦋

Loving Kindness Prayer💙
May you be safe
May you be healthy
May you be happy
May you be loved
img_0819

DISCLAIMER: Poetry, views, thoughts,and opinions expressed on this blog belong solely to the author and Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC

Protected by Copyscape Online Copyright Search

DMCA.com Protection Status

Self Care Sunday – The Mirror and Universe

Mirror quote

The Mirror

One of the keys to personal and spiritual growth is the ability to see everyone in your life as a mirror, a mirror reflecting back to you strengths, weaknesses and irritations. The reflections in the mirrors are tools to awaken you through self awareness – but only if you are courageous enough to make the choice to see them.

In recent years, I’ve embraced this practice. At times when I’ve found myself irritated by another person or when I’ve found myself standing in judgment of another’s actions, I’ve tried to have the discipline to challenge myself. I’ve challenged myself to look within myself for the same qualities I see in that person. I often ask myself, “Why am I seeing this in them? Do I also hold the same quality? Do I have the same habit? Do I need to grow in the same way?” This isn’t an easy practice. No one wants to see their limitations and weaknesses. We are conditioned to hide our flaws so deep within that we can’t even acknowledge them to ourself. We are taught to be prideful, confident and self-assured to the point we can teeter on the tip of arrogance. It’s very hard to undo that conditioning. It’s very hard to accept our own limitations. Brave is the individual who makes the commitment to open their eyes to their own truth – no matter how ugly it might be. Change can’t happen without acknowledgement of the “as is” state.

I started a new job five weeks ago. Since day one I recognized that one of my team members (not a manager) is a mirror for me. While I respect my coworker and admire her commitment to hard work, she refuses to ask people for help. She tries to do everything herself. She puts a tremendous amount of pressure on herself. She keeps so much to herself that it’s hard for anyone else to help her. This means she also can be a bottleneck for communication, collaboration and progression. I haven’t shared my observation with any managers as I like her & don’t want to put her under the bus. I know she is working very hard. I also don’t know the history. Perhaps she developed this habit out of necessity to ensure things got done or she sees it as job protection. I don’t know her motives. I only know it’s her habit. I am slowly working to build trust and open her up; she’s finally let me in a bit and let me help her this week.

I recognized this pattern in her so easily because I do that same thing. I bury myself and try to do everything myself. I see now, as my responsibly level grows, I have to break this habit. I have to use the mirror and choose to change that habit. I took on a project this week to refine requirements for a contract. I originally planned to do all the work myself. In a flash of self-awareness, I realized I would cover more ground and I would be able to redefine the requirements better by asking for the help from subject matter experts. So, as of Thursday, I am now facilitating the work. I am helping to exchange information and ideas (moving the project forward) as oppose to writing everything myself. It’s opportunity of me to stretch my managerial skills and leadership abilities as well as get a better product in the long run. I am choosing to grow by using my coworker as a mirror.

Strengths

Food for thought

Who are your mirrors? Do you see a weakness in another that you can use to provoke growth in yourself? Are you in alignment with the Universe? Are you heeding the signs? Do you know when you are being divinely guided to a new opportunity? Are you manifesting your best life?

Chakras meme

(C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC – All Rights Reserved

Everything is always working out for my highest good 💙🦋

Loving Kindness Prayer💙
May you be safe
May you be healthy
May you be happy
May you be loved
img_0819

DISCLAIMER: Poetry, views, thoughts,and opinions expressed on this blog belong solely to the author and Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC

Protected by Copyscape Online Copyright Search

DMCA.com Protection Status

Self Care Sunday ~ Jumping Into A Fire

Risk quote

Something unexpected happened this week. I received an email from the Institute Of Integrative Nutrition. Since I paid my tuition for my Holistic Health Coaching Course in full before school began in May 2017, they gave me a FREE six month Book Writing course($999 value) as a bonus. I had one year from my graduation date in May 2018 to enroll. I forgot about it; they emailed me to let me know my last shot to enroll in the free course is the class starting on June 3rd.

There was only one problem with this. I wasn’t really planning on going back to school for a while… My initial reaction to the email was hesitation. Do I really want to sign up for a six month course which means 5 to 10 hours a week for homework and writing. Really? Now? God damn Universe…I was kind of enjoying being lazy 😂

After thinking about it, I would feel bad not taking advantage of the opportunity and wasting the free course worth $999. The truth is I have been itching for some spiritual/intellectual stimulation and looking for a new hobby. I jumped in 😂 I enrolled in the June 3rd course. Any time you get something worth $999 for free, it’s time for the Happy Dance!

Happy Dance gif

With careful deliberation, I am approaching this course differently than I approached my studies in the past. I will not put myself under any pressure with this course because it is for personal enrichment only. Which means it’s a hobby and I can relax with it. I am lowering my expectations of myself in it too. I’ll be happy if I at least learn how to write the book and come out with an outline for a book. That’s all I want from it. I will also be happy if I start having discipline to intentionally set aside time for writing each week. I usually freestyle my writing; focusing on being more disciplined with writing will be a challenge for me… Lastly, the truth is I don’t really care if I finish this course. If it gets to be too much, I’ll just take a slower pace. I will still have access to the course information for two years after the six months is over. All I have to do really is download the information each week and save it as reference for when I am ready to dive in. Yep, I’ve changed and this time I am not stressing about it.

The funny thing is I was toying with the idea of writing a book. I even have a topic I am interested in writing about. It is kind of interesting the opportunity to take a free book writing course manifested now. The Universe is absolutely amazing. I am a powerful creator 😇✨The two topics I enjoy reading about the most are holistic approaches to wellness and executive leadership. Without giving too much away about my premise, I plan to write a book merging both topics. – holistic wellness with executive leadership or holistic leadership. I have plenty of reference materials plus my education. I also work with many leaders, coaches and managers. I can talk to them “unofficially/confidentially” and perhaps pick their brains without quoting them or using privileged information. I hope to, at least, get some feedback and advice. I would actually love for my former Group Manager to be a writing partner but I don’t know if he would/could do something like that🙏If not, I definitely hope he can at least be a confidential advisor since he’s shaped much of my experience. I kind of grew up working for him. I think he’s the bees knees and I don’t care if he knows it 😊😂✌️😘

So, I jumped into a six month writing course that starts June 3rd and it looks like I will be writing a book on holistic leadership… That feels like the deep end of the pool. I hope to hell I can swim. With working a full time job, I have a feeling the below meme could end up as my experience most days but I will hope for the best. I hope once I get rolling and with having the structure of the course, I will be better with procrastination.

Book writing meme

I also jumped in at work. It’s more like jumping into a dumpster fire there rather than the deep end of the pool 🔥🔥😂I started a new job a month ago. I have enough knowledge and experience that I was able to jump right into the mix. It took me a little time to understand the shorthand this new team uses but I know enough that I am not struggling too much. A few people weren’t really happy about me being added to the team. They didn’t understand my role. They seemed to feel threatened. I’ve been working very hard to clarify that I am not a threat to anyone. I am there to help bring discipline and strategy to their planning and processes. I am there to put structure around them to make things work a little better. I am there to help them understand and utilize the contract more efficiently. Leadership hasn’t been great at communicating that to the team so I’ve had to do it myself and now folks are more receptive. Yep, jumping right into a dumpster fire.

Jumping into a fire meme

Unfortunately, I am observing that there are fundamental inequities in the team’s understanding of their requirements versus what is actually in our contract. My observation was validated by another contracts specialist. Hyper-reactivity to the daily fires means the team has been pushing for quick turn around times on contracting issues which isn’t always the most advantageous for us in the long run. Quick fixes are sometimes needed in the work we do but then you need to have the discipline to wrap back around and look to see if you broke something in long run. A quick fix could water-down what was already in affect contractually if we aren’t careful with the wording and execution. Thankfully, a leader recognized my concern as valid and helped me form a workgroup to evaluate at least one problem they’ve been having. We need to understand if there are truly gaps or are we just not enforcing properly. They are all onboard now and this could be my first win with the team. Yep, I jumped right into the fire with them. Hope my perspective helps the team be more efficient.

What I am hoping to demonstrate in this post is what I am mean about holistic leadership. Take me for example, I took the time to work on my holistic health. Feeding the body, mind and spirit every day is essential to holistic wellness for all beings. As for myself, I’ve learned how to create and enforce boundaries. I need to learn and grow for fulfillment. I know I need to enjoy my work. I take time to replenish my body, mind and spirit daily. This makes me a better more productive employee. It also gives me confidence to assert myself respectfully and it helps me challenge others to meet me on my level. I used holistic methods to coach myself to be a better leader but imagine using these and other holistic wellness approaches with your staff…That’s holistic leadership. I can’t wait to explore this topic in a book. Someone may have already wrote about this but they won’t have my unique flavor or perspective 😊

Below my latest professional development read. It’s about creating workplaces where employees feel safe to express themselves and are empowered to be innovative without fear. I heard about it on Twitter from leadership author, Mark Crowley – www.markccrowley.com. I haven’t started it yet. It just arrived yesterday. I’ve had a bit of a migraine from allergies and haven’t been able to read much the last couple of days. If you are interested in reading this book, you can order it on Amazon either in Kindle or hardcover. I am building up a reference library for the book so I can use quotes.

The Fearless Organization

Let me ask you – Are you willing to jump into the unknown having no clue where it will take you? If not, perhaps explore what’s holding you back. Fear of failure held me back for a long time but not any longer. Failure is just another method of learning. Failure is only a problem if you don’t learn from it. For me, the excitement and adventure of jumping into something is worth the risk of failing…

Fear of failure quote

(C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC – All Rights Reserved

Everything is always working out for my highest good 💙🦋

Loving Kindness Prayer💙
May you be safe
May you be healthy
May you be happy
May you be loved
img_0819

DISCLAIMER: Poetry, views, thoughts,and opinions expressed on this blog belong solely to the author and Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC

Protected by Copyscape Online Copyright Search

DMCA.com Protection Status

Self Care Sunday – Trusting the Process

Spiritual meme

The hardest part of change is trusting that you will be ok once everything settles down. It’s hard to have faith that you are making the right choices and doing the right thing when everything is in chaos or feels stressful and icky. But those fearful moments are when it’s essential to TRUST THE PROCESS… Change, big change, requires for things to shift. That shift can feel like an earthquake or just a small tremor. However the shift feels, I am sorry to tell you, discomfort is an essential component of change. Trust the process…

The funny thing is that last paragraph shot out of my fingers in like 30 seconds. It was almost like someone needed to hear that message and spirit was moving through me to deliver it…I know that sounds weird but other folks into spiritual stuff will know what I mean. Whoever needed to hear that message, you will be fine, just fine. Enjoy the ride… You manifested this change for a reason. Trust the Universe is bringing you into alignment with your highest good.

Spiritual meme

The latest development in my career occurred this week when I was asked to give a presentation to executive leadership on why I declined a job offer 😳😂Nothing like being on the hot seat 😂While it was a bit awkward, I was actually very relaxed because I was finally able to speak my truth. The truth has been pushing against my Throat Chakra for months now just waiting to come out😳😂 I had to use all of my spiritual know how to control my mouth. Yep, I am an Aries with Aries Rising. I am a FIRE Sign 🔥 Not always easy to control the flame but I have made a strong effort in recent years to learn to hold my words and use them strategically.

I was very relaxed through the whole briefing because I knew I had documentation to back up my assessment and I also had the support of my organizational leaders. I carefully stepped through my experience. I expressed my gratitude for opportunity before pivoting to explaining that I turned down the job because I no longer enjoyed the work. The challenges and frustrations associated far exceeded any potential for fulfillment in the doing the work. By the end of the meeting they understood it wasn’t an easy choice for me to make but it was the right choice for me considering the situation.

As I spoke, my Director stepped in at times to shape a narrative that turned a negative situation into an opportunity to strategically reposition the organization 👍 She moved her agenda forward by using my situation to illustrate that she needs more funding for STEM related programs! 😂 Seriously, I’ve always respected her but watching her in action was amazing🙌 I walked out of the meeting not only feeling supported but I also felt like a weight was finally off my shoulders. As I walked down the hall with my former boss, he looked over and said, “Now, you know it’s not over yet and you will be hearing from us again, right?” 😂😂😂 I was quick to let him know I am open to all conversations about opportunities to do fulfilling work I enjoy. We will see how this plays out… It’s been a fun ride!

Life is a ride

Well, I need to make a confession… After throwing away twelve pairs of shoes, I went on a shoe buying binge. Some would call it a shopping “bender”👠It led to also buying bras, pants, jackets, sweaters, etc…. Yep, a bender ☺️I think it’s over now. The below image depicts the logic I used to justify my shopping bender 😂

Shoe meme

In case this helps anyone with similar back/hip pain…I recently learned that my hip pain isn’t true hip pain, it’s actually Piriformis Muscle Syndrome and also a tight IT band. In other words, I have a tight butt — but not in a good way😂 The pain can go from my hip down my whole leg. What makes it better?

  • Walking in good shoes that aren’t worn out!
  • Getting Chiropractic Adjustment every two weeks
  • Piriformis stretches twice a day; holding it for 30 seconds each time.
  • If you have low back pain or stiffness, try these stretches to release it. If you are new to stretching, do not push it too far. You want to feel a stretch but not over stretch it and injury yourself. Start slow and small; work yourself up to deeper longer stretches. I do the seated stretch at least four times a day for 30 second holds especially after long walks, sitting or driving long distances. I am starting to work with personal trainer to build strength though my whole body. Strengthening and stretching are really the only ways to stabilize Piriformis muscle group.

    Piriformis Syndrome

    Piriformis

    Piriformis Stretches

    Piriformis Stretches

    One last note, Game of Thrones Season 8 starts tomorrow night. I am so excited. I rewatched all of Season 7 and the last episode of Season 6. I am ready. It’s such a great show. I don’t usually go for fantasy type of shows but this about POWER. It’s about who has power, who wants power and what they will do to get or keep power. I love it. I secretly play Daenerys Targaryen, Dragon Queen(Mother of Dragons) while I am at home watching 😂😂 She is also the sexiest Queen on the show 😉

    Game of Thrones

    (C) 2019 Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC – All Rights Reserved

    Everything is always working out for my highest good 💙🦋

    Loving Kindness Prayer💙
    May you be safe
    May you be healthy
    May you be happy
    May you be loved
    img_0819

    DISCLAIMER: Poetry, views, thoughts,and opinions expressed on this blog belong solely to the author and Highest Good Holistic Health Coaching, LLC

    Protected by Copyscape Online Copyright Search

    DMCA.com Protection Status